It is written in Divrei Hayamim I (Chronicles 1) 28:9: Know the God of your fathers and serve Him. To know means being conscious because the Nefesh, that is, the desire in itself, cannot exist without consciousness, without a sensation that there is something clear, something definite within it. Desire must feel and define its sensations and compare them.
Together with understanding the sensations, a fulfillment appears; you see the person strives and longs for true service to the Creator. This is what is in us, this is what pushes us. Our lives are so confused, concealing from us what we are truly doing.
We are also now carrying out all that we are required to do, only the true state, the true world in which we are found, is concealed from us. We feel ourselves as a shadow of our true state, and all that we do is directed towards returning to awareness of this subconscious state. But along with this, neither our world nor the actions that we do within it will change; rather, we will see it in another form.
The person doesn’t understand that his longing, his aspiration, all that he does for the sake of egoistic development (it makes no difference how he acts in our world), all our actions are contingent on only one thing and are directed towards it: the desire to perceive the Creator. And until we perceive the Creator, the origin which illuminates us and gives us life, we will not rest and we will always feel unwell. In other words, the origin for all of our negative feelings is the concealment of the Creator, while His discovery gives us fulfillment, ecstasy, which is the goal of creation.
The person aspires to perceive the Creator in all his actions, both consciously and unconsciously. You see, it’s as if we desire and are ready to even agree to nullify our ego somehow to connect together: “Put before us all the conditions given for existence that we can fulfill, then we will be ready to discover You.”
But even though we have urges like these, not even drives, but permanent desires, this is still not enough. Even if we gather together, connect, sing, cry, dance, learn, work on connection, it makes no difference what we do and how much we strive, our efforts will not yield fruit if the Light of the Creator will not illuminate them.
Therefore our efforts should not to be either spontaneous or temporary. They must be crystallized in the right form with intensity, with direction, with character in order to attract the Light of the Creator onto us. Without the influence of the Light on us, our nature would remain the same egoistic nature, and we will “stew” within ourselves, no qualitative changes will take place within us.
From the St. Petersburg Convention “Day Three” 7/14/13, Lesson 5