Answer: If you don’t demand powers from the Creator, then you naturally receive them from the ego. There are only two sources for a person’s motivation and accordingly it may be egoistic or higher, either in order to receive or in order to bestow.
So how can you check yourself? How can you find out that you are actually working in order to bestow?
I feel different disappointments, problems, emptiness, and even troubles in my desire, but I only demand one thing from the Creator, to raise my altruistic motivation without any reward for myself. I am glad that my ego feels bad, that it is empty and dissatisfied. It is a good sign; if I can continue working now it is indeed in order to bestow.
According to Kabbalistic terms, I “restrict” my desire, and put a screen (Masach) and the Returning Light (Ohr Hozer) on top of it. Generally speaking the desire always remains empty since restriction is not nullified. Then I begin to work above my desire in order to bestow, being sure that I relate to life, to reality, to the Creator, and to everyone correctly.
But if I don’t feel emptiness, disappointments, or troubles in my ego in order to be drawn above them to bestowal, to worrying about the Creator, then it means that I am still in my egoistic desire. I work in it, and although I advance towards the intention of in order to bestow, I am still immersed in self love. Of course, I try to bestow, but all my attempts are nourished by egoistic motives. This means that if I didn’t receive pleasures, I would have no motivation, no powers, no urge to carry on along the spiritual path
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/8/13, Questions and Answers