Rabash, “Three Lines:” Before a person is granted to exit self love and to do everything in order to bestow, which is called Lishma (for Her name), even though a person studies different things the way they are, they are only names with no commentary, since he has no attainment of the matters that he studies, since he knows nothing about the upper roots that are called by the Holy names or Sefirot or Partzufim.
And we can learn the upper matters, called the wisdom of Kabbalah, only by way of merit, since they can bring a person a desire and passion to adhere to the Creator, since these are Holy matters referring to the Holy names…and when a person studies the upper matters in order to get closer to Holiness, it brings the closeness of the Lights, which he wants this study to bring him, so that he will be granted to aim all his actions in order to bestow, and this is called working in preparation, as a person prepares himself to be ready to enter the King’s palace and to adhere to Him.
There are several phases in the preparation work. In the first phase of the study a person listens, but he doesn’t hear, since he doesn’t know what it’s about. All the terms Kabbalah books speak about are hidden from a person—he doesn’t feel them and doesn’t see; he doesn’t discern himself or his environment. So he imagines what he hears as he desires.
He doesn’t work with these concepts and cannot discern them or respond to them, he thinks that Pharaoh is a person who rules Egypt, which is a distant country, that the Creator is very far, and that Israel is someone who is born to a Jewish family. He lacks the right spiritual concepts, so that he can immediately feel an inner reaction if he hears them.
If he hears about a pain in the heart, the head, the arm or the leg, he can immediately imagine it. He would feel a reaction to the word he hears, but the Kabbalistic terms don’t evoke any reaction in him, and so in the meantime he studies without attributing all this to himself. But the Surrounding Light operates on him and reforms him, and to the extent that a person does everything in his power, it brings him closer to the upper world.
The main thing is that at first a person doesn’t know that the only way to advance is by subduing himself to the group, the teacher and the books. After all, he is like a baby who has to adhere to the grown ups, to an upper level. By that he shortens or prolongs time. The preparation may take several years, until he comes close enough to the Light and begins to feel how the Light operates in him and begins to discern every attribute in him. This can take 20-30 years.
Everything depends on the extent to which a person can subdue himself before the teacher, the group, and the study with all the means that he has. It’s the study period of Yenika (infancy) when one must adhere and devote himself to the upper level, when you annul your mind and everything that you know as much as possible. Then there is the stage of greater awareness, when a person already begins to discern these attributes in him and to experience ascents and descents.
In the third phase he already understands that it’s the Creator who evokes these ascents and descents in him, as He calls him, “Come to Pharaoh!” The Creator is always on the right side, and Pharaoh is on the left side, and a person is left in the middle between these two forces. But until this is actually revealed within him, he can only guess that that’s the way it is according to his own reactions. Eventually he cries out since he cannot exit himself and break free of Pharaoh’s domination, and then is granted redemption.
Afterwards the road doesn’t get any easier. A person simply sees everything that happens along this road differently. Redemption becomes an opportunity to bestow for him, to ascend above himself and to work disregarding the unpleasant inner feelings.
Thus he advances and his advancement is determined by the re-evaluation of his values.
From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 11/15/12