Initially in the world of Nekudim, Malchut connects to Bina, creating the small state (Katnut). Then Bina connects to Malchut giving her strength by which Malchut appears to attain the big state (Gadlut). This action is performed by Aba ve Ima of the world of Nekudim. However, there is a desire in Malchut called “Malchut de-Malchut,” which is unable to include the qualities of Bina in itself and simply remains Malchut. Hence, this is the reason for the breaking, and in every particle and desire there is a part of this desire called “the stony heart” (Dalet de-Dalet), which is incapable of mixing with Bina.
The lifting of the Second Restriction (Tzimtzum Bet) has led to the revelation of desires that are unable to accept Bina (bestowal). Yet it’s impossible to know ahead of time that Malchut includes desires that will always remain egoistic since they can only be revealed by the breaking! Therefore, the world of Atzilut appears after the breaking and already knows what to select for corrections: Bina in Malchut, Malchut in Bina, and pure Bina, as well as knowing not to use pure Malchut. In sum, all of this knowledge comes thanks to the breaking.
Thus on our path upward, we need to receive an impression from the breaking. This means we are bending over backwards, but see that we’re powerless. We try to unite with others, bestow to them, and love them while accepting their love, but see that we’re incapable. We must reveal this quality within ourselves, and this means we ultimately reveal that very part of Malchut that is unable to include Bina within. That is when a person breaks down and weeps, and therein resides the point from where correction comes.
Indeed, everything else is easily corrected. The main thing is to separate Malchut de-Malchut from the rest of the desires that can be corrected. Our analysis and separation must be done before anything else. In this way, we correct the parts that can be corrected.
From the 2nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/18/10, Beit Shaar HaKavanot