Question: In his book Give and Take, psychologist and professor Adam Grant divides people into three groups: takers, givers, and matchers. “Givers like to give more than they get, paying attention to what others need. Takers like to get more than they give, seeing the world as a competitive place and primarily looking out for themselves. And matchers balance and give on a quid pro quo basis, willing to exchange favors but careful about not being exploited.”
What do you think about these three groups?
Answer: Most of all I like the matchers because they lead to contact, to mutual, good, kind contact. This is the most important thing. It is not about the fact that you can give away as much as you want. It will not do anything. It is the same with receiving if someone gives something to you.
Exchanging, however, causes mutuality, and by this you can correct a person, you can change both yourself and the other, and create communication between you; this is the most important thing. The goal is to create communication.
A giver will not do anything. On the contrary, he can cause hatred if he gives all the time. It does not mean anything.
Comment: So you are a realist. You give me something, I give you something? Exchange pleasantries.
My Response: Yes, but by this we teach each other that he can do the same thing that I do; by giving to him, I open myself in order to receive something from him. And so on. The most important thing is mutual exchange.
Question: Isn’t our world today built on this, “You scratch my back and I will scratch yours”?
Answer: The world is built on mutual exchange.
Question: Does it mean that you are satisfied with what is happening in the world today?
Answer: No. This does not satisfy me because the current exchange that exists in the world is only to take and not to give.
Question: What is the next stage after matching?
Answer: This is written in Kabbalah: mine is mine, yours is mine, and then yours is yours, and mine is yours.
Question: That is, you come to an almost impossible state. To something that is impossible to imagine: mine is yours and yours is yours, right?
Answer: Yes. Such relationships are the most correct ones that are justified by the upper nature, which is opposite to our nature. This is what we must come to. Together with this, a completely different space is revealed to us, an eternal world.
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 6/24/21