Question: Now, while we are still in the preparation mode, we demand to get the power of bestowal. Will our request change after we enter the spiritual world, or will we ask for the same thing again?
Answer: It’s the same request, but during our preparation period it bears an egoistic nature Lo Lishma. I ask to be given the force of bestowal, but subconsciously I hope to get some benefit for myself. So, it’s called “Lo Lishma” but the request per se remains the same.
The preparation period starts with my first request about the power of bestowal. This period ends when we receive this power, which we use to enter the spiritual world. There, we receive the power of bestowal again.
When I obtain the power of bestowal by preparing the desire for genuine bestowal, I use this power to request a stronger power of bestowal. At this time, it’s the force at the level of Bina, Hafetz Hesed, bestowal for the sake of bestowal. At the next level I again ask for the power of bestowal to receive for the sake of bestowal, but this time it’s the level of Hochma. This is how I move forward until I get to the level of final correction (Gmar Tikkun), the state of Keter. Continually, I ask for the power of bestowal and the difference is what desires it will rule over and what is its strength.
I realize that in order to acquire the power of bestowal, I have to sense the greatness of the Creator. To the degree of my ability to sense it, I will be able to “bend” my desire. During the preparation period and to the extent of the greatness of the Creator, I manage to correct my Lo Lishma and desire less for my own sake. This is how I prepare my bestowal desires for the next stage of bestowal for the sake of bestowal as well as my receiving desires for the state of receiving for the sake of bestowal.
Everything depends on the realization of the Creator’s greatness, which helps me rise above my egoism. It’s possible to transition from the verbal request to the internal demand in the heart only with the help of the Light. This is done by the Reforming Light.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 7/12/12, Writings of Rabash