From The Light of the Sun by Rabbi Kalonymus Kalman Halevi: The main attainment of the Torah is by unity, as it says: “And Israel camped there before the mountain, as one man with one heart, and there the giving was stopped and each tribe corrected and added his Ha-Va-Ya-H.

And they said we shall hear and we shall do in great passion from the bottom of their hearts and they raised Mei Nukvin and they revealed Maim Dekurin, that the Creator descended to give them the Torah and they were rewarded with attainment of the Torah.

The attainment of the Torah means the attainment of the plan of all of creation, its goal, the attainment of the whole path of correction that is attained by unity. This is because we have to correct the shattering and as a result, in addition to the correction of the shattering, we reach attainment. This means that by our exertion we add to our understanding, to the recognition of the state that we are in. We open all the spiritual worlds for ourselves from one level to another until the world of Ein Sof (Infinity).

But before we reach this attainment, we don’t feel any difference between our world and the world of Ein Sof. Infinity is attained only by unity, and the unity is built on two lines—the right and the left, love and hate—one in contrast to the other.

Therefore it says: “And Israel camped there before the mountain” (Jethro, 19, 20), they stood before the hatred they discovered after they had always been in the right line, enthusiastic about spirituality, striving for unity, and eager to connect. It was then that they discovered the left line that stood before them like a high mountain not letting them connect.

Then they needed the Torah, the Light that Reforms, and then they discovered the middle line, the Torah, the Creator that is revealed and helps connect the two lines together. Thanks to their prayer, they received an answer from Above. The Creator descended and gave them the Torah and so they were awarded with the attainment of the Torah.

So we must constantly follow the right line, in pure bestowal, in Hafetz Hesed, and then in contrast to it, the left line is revealed: different failures, disappointments, weaknesses, criticism, Din. It’s good that all this is revealed since by that we eventually realize that there is no other choice and that we have to follow the right line.

We see that there’s nothing we can enjoy in the left line and that these are vessels of receiving that demand filling and there is no filling! So all that is left, despite everything, is to ascend above all this; when we attain a full measure, a full measure of the revelation of the right and the left lines, the gathering before Mt. Sinai is revealed, the middle line, and then the Light that connects the two line comes to us. This is called “the Creator makes peace in Heaven and He will bring peace unto us.” The middle line comes and decides between the first two lines by bringing us to peace and wholeness.

The Torah is attained by unity, if we constantly yearn for it as it says, “and Israel camped before the mountain, as one man with one heart.” No matter how hard they tried to connect, they discovered the opposite: detachment, hatred, and rejection. “And there their impurity was stopped and each tribe corrected the combination of its Ha – Va – Ya – H,” which means that in each of us and among all of us there are many internal problems and conflicts that require correction.

“And they said, ‘We shall do and we shall hear!’” which means that they are ready to go above their reason, above the feeling of any criticism, since there is no other choice, since we have seen that we can’t connect in our egoistic vessels. “And they raised Mei Nukvin (MAN) and in contrast Maim Dekurin were revealed, and the Creator descended to give them the Torah and they were rewarded with the attainment of the Torah.” Let’s hope that we will be rewarded with the receiving of the Torah since the Creator gives it every day.
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From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/26/12

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We can never imagine and appreciate the upper level since it is a new dimension each time and we enter another world. All our inner data change, our elements change and each time it is as if a new creature, a new creation. This is how the new Reshimot (informational genes) are revealed.

So how can we summon our advancement and think about the Creator’s greatness, about the height of the next level in comparison to the one we are on now? This is why we work indirectly with the help of the environment, by being impressed by it and receiving new values from it, so that a person can imagine bestowal as a connection and love above his ego.

Thanks to the environment, we can somehow depict this picture to ourselves, but in order to advance, we have to demand more from this picture, the uppermost level, which is two levels higher than the one we are on. If the next level is already Ein Sof for us, how can we imagine something that is above Ein Sof?

However, we must imagine that the highest level, which means the revelation of the Creator, is even higher than anything I can imagine. It is then that my appeal to the Creator is right. It is because the upper level is the same state that I want to attain. The level that is above is the one from whom I ask for help to attain the upper level.

I turn to the one above the upper in order to attain the upper. If I present my appeal this way, then it is exactly on a straight line aimed at the Creator. I want to attain the level of bestowal, connection, love of others, and adhesion. But in order to attain this, I don’t turn for help to some unknown factor, but straight to the Creator. Everything is connected in the upper level to one whole: Israel, the Torah (the Light that Reforms), and the Creator.

Israel is me, the one who attains the upper level by the Light, which I receive from the Creator, who is on the uppermost level, but who “comes out” to meet me on the next level. If we have this arrangement we can be sure that we are on one straight line.

The important levels for us are the lower (the current level), the upper, and the uppermost. This is the order of the levels.
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From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/25/12

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We need to get the power to advance not by the desire to receive. In it, we do not want to receive any gifts. Otherwise we would always remain on the level of this world, as we see in science and in general that every egoistic motive doesn’t lead to any spiritual advancement.

Spiritual advancement is possible only by the force that is revealed in the vessels of bestowal. So what should we do if in the meantime we don’t have such vessels, how can we advance? Where can we get the energy for these actions?

Here we need faith above reason. This energy, this mental power, also comes from Above but in faith above reason, which means not in our vessels of receiving, but through the environment. To the extent that we can work with the group on the Creator’s greatness, we impress one another and are empowered.

This force is not part of our personal vessels in any way, yet it comes by our connection and bestowal upon one another. By that we draw the Light that Reforms, which enables us to advance.

Eventually the vessels that work with the intention to bestow, with the force of bestowal, are built in a person. It is a totally new mechanism that operates according to the laws of spiritual physics. A person is allowed to work for bestowal, for Heaven. This is what we have to reach.

This means that we don’t have to chase knowledge and the revelation of the Creator, the Light, but you yearn for the acquisition of vessels of bestowal, for the ability to perform true spiritual actions, without any self-benefit. If the group has accepted this as its goal, it receives an illumination from Above, which builds in it such a vessel of Bina that is also called Noah’s ark.
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From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/24/12

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Question: What should I do when I try to hold on to the intention and then the opposite happens and something draws me to the side?

Answer: This is wonderful. The moment you try to hold on to an intention, it evades you or is extinguished by something so that you will hold on to it more strongly. Then by different interruptions, you will be able to differentiate the corrections that you make by carrying on. The Creator shows them to you.

Today it is as if everything is blurred by different problems, but in fact it isn’t so, it is always a kind of help, and it guides you more accurately towards the goal. You aim at it, and suddenly it seems blurry, so that you will “aim” more sensitively and more accurately. And that’s how it is all the time.

Eventually you will be able to recognize the state of the next level from your current state. By the revelation of the ten Sefirot you see reality from end to end and then you are allowed to ascend higher.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/23/12, The Zohar

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Everything is arranged such that the upper force, the good and the benevolent, is Above in the hands of the Creator. In order to reach this force and to identify with it, a person has to be adapted to it, to adhere to it, and to just discover a desire for that. His corrections and his ascent totally depend on the upper force.

It turns out that there is a negative force below and a positive force above, and a person is in between so that he will be able to determine by himself whether he wants to join the force of receiving or the force of bestowal.

When he sets himself apart from these two forces and begins to determine his state, it means that he is connected to the “human” point in him. All our work is to clarify what the states we constantly fall into mean. The upper force determines all these feelings within our ego, our desires, and our attributes so that we will see how opposite we are from the upper nature that we want to resemble and attain.

Accordingly, we will be able to determine what to ask for. In fact, nothing is required of us but the request, and it is the sum of all our exertion.

Therefore it says: “I have labored and found!” I exert myself in order to check and to clarify my current attributes, which I received as a preparation from Above as a result of the shattering. I have to compare these attributes to the Creator’s attributes, but how do I know who the Creator is?

I have to yearn for bestowal in the group and constantly feel the greatness of the goal. When an opposite force is revealed in me, I will be able to compare the two forces. I don’t compare myself with others, but constantly raise the right line and then the left line is evoked in me. Between these two lines I clarify my deficiency by yearning to resemble the right line together with my left line.

Thus I perform the “holy work” in my correction and do everything in my power to finally discover how opposite I am from holiness and purity. This brings me to a prayer.

Everything is first attained only by the power of prayer, which is the end result of all our efforts. If I discover the right deficiency inside me, I am rewarded with bestowal by the Light, with correction and then with a filling, which means with adhesion to the Creator.

A person attains the implementation of the work in this very special way: From the absolute opposite from the Creator, he adheres to the Creator. We should understand that there is no higher state in our work than the feeling of deficiency, a prayer, if this deficiency is real. This is how the sum, the conclusion, of all our exertion is revealed.
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From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/23/12

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Question: What does it mean to draw the Light that Reforms?

Answer: When I read The Zohar, I want to see changes inside me, as if a stream of energy enters my internal system, a light, powers, new discernments, new attributes. Something influences me, and I want to feel what it is that influences me and performs changes in me. I want to know this and to feel the flavors and see how these changes take place in me and where inside me I can imagine everything that I read about in The Zohar so that it will not just be imagination, but that I will really feel it in my attributes. This is what I expect, the changes in my desire to receive.

We have to make collective efforts, in mutual help, and then the Light that Reforms will be much stronger than when it influences a single person. Then it is much easier to achieve something. But this is only if a person works with others, in connection with them. By that, he approaches the Light since his desires for the Light are not egoistic any more, but are similar to it in some way.

Of course it is still for himself, but a person tries to resemble the Light in some way and to seemingly become equal to it. This is called a “game.” Of course, I am asking for myself, but to some extent it is like the real and correct attribute of bestowal.

In what way is it similar? Several thousand egoists come together, all of them want to bestow, although deep in their soul everyone wants for himself and disrespects everyone else, but they make collective efforts, as if connecting, as if yearning, as if for the Creator, for bestowal—this “as if” is called a “game.” They “brainwash” each other’s minds as if it is really something great and important. In fact there is nothing real here, but this is what should be done in order to attain the upper level. This is because there is an abyss between the levels, and you cannot be in an upper level before you ascend to it, and in order to ascend you play it.

So we have to connect more strongly and to want to feel that that Light changes us. In the meantime it just changes us, but later our intention will be more accurate, so that it will change us in our connection, in unity, but this will come later. Now at least we have to aim at the influence of the Light.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/22/12, The Zohar

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While reading The Zohar, we first of all aim at the Light that Reforms. I think only about it as if I go through some healing process connected to an IV infusion with the upper force constantly flowing through me.

If I think about it, I can already advance. It says that the Torah is the essence of the holy names, which means the acts of bestowal, the Creator, the Light that Reforms, which brings me good thoughts and desires to bestow.

So I try to locate them inside me now while reading The Book of Zohar: “Perhaps something is happening in me?” I want to adhere to the same actions that the Light performs. I want it to perform them in me; I am ready to become Nukva, to receive everything. Let it come and dress in me and do whatever it wants with me.

This is called to “discover the holy names,” “to want to know what one studies, “to study the Torah,” to study the actions of the Light upon my desire to receive—how the Light reforms.

I don’t feel that the Light influences me, but I want to feel it! Being connected to an ordinary infusion a person can lie either unconsciously or consciously just looking at the drops dripping.

But we want to feel how the drops of the Light heal us and what each drop adds. I want to feel it because I want to learn about it, about how to act, how each drop changes my desire to receive; a drop here and a drop there, with relation to one thing or another. By that I learn how I can use every slight change in my recognition, in my understanding, when I get up after this healing process.

The main thing is that I expect to see the actions of the Creator in order to learn from them, in order to know what they are, who I am and how I can resemble the Light that influences me now. I have to perform actions that are identical to the Light’s, to learn from them, as it says: “From Your actions we shall know You.”
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/22/12, The Zohar

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Question: Yesterday during the seminar, we really felt that we wanted to achieve the goal very much and were completely unable to do so. But then the aftertaste of despair remained: there are no count to these states.

Answer: True. It was what the sons of Israel felt in Egypt, a threat to remain forever under the rule of Pharaoh.

Question: In real life, if a person wants to achieve something, to learn something, he needs to pass the crucial exam. And he comes to the exam in despair because he cannot know everything.

Answer: Our examination is not based on knowledge. The task is not that you give the correct answers, but the fact of what you ask for.

Imagine that I am an examiner. Do not tell me about your positive and negative potential, accumulated during the training. Do not try to soften me with your confusion. You need to act differently here: If you really see that that there is no alternative, then bring the awareness of your own helplessness and the willingness to be changed. No more, just these two things: “I cannot” and “I have to,” and they both must be of equal strength.

So far, you haven’t obtained from the group either the sufficient demand or sufficient frustration. But they are opposite each other and depend on each other: If you do not crave the goal, you will not discover its unattainability. Both poles lack power so far. Yes, both of them have already emerged due to our workshops; however, the matter is how you fill the time between the workshops.

Question: And yet, in this world, there is a date of the exam, which I know in advance.

Answer: The time of the spiritual examination comes when you are able to pass it. Do you want it today? Please. Once you are ready, there is nothing that can prevent you.
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From the 4^th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/22/12, “Matan Torah (The Giving of the Torah)”

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A person has to make efforts, to play in order to annul himself as much as he can, and to value the environment as much as possible. As a result of this game, the right line is built in him in which he thinks that he wants to stay for the rest of his life. The moment he reaches “satiation,” he cuts himself off from this state and dedicates time to the left line.

In the left line he checks himself: “Do I really think that way, and attain this way? Do I really feel the recognition of the Creator’s greatness within my vessels and the recognition of this wholeness? Have I really attained such an understanding and feeling in my heart and mind, or is it just an external impression like of an embryo in his mother’s womb who totally annuls himself?”

But I don’t want to annul myself. I have just annulled my desires in the right line and I want to feel the greatness of the Creator directly in the desire, which I now discover in the left line.

Then I feel a deficiency, but I keep these two lines so that they will balance one another and none of them will be tilted in order to keep the balance. There is no specific time limit for the right line or the left line, although it says that one should spend twenty-three and a half hours in the right line and only half an hour in the left line.

We have to try to add as much as possible to the right line and to the left line. We shouldn’t decide that we have done enough and that now we should wait for the Creator to start acting and to complete these two lines for me.

A person constantly switches from one line to the other until he makes enough efforts and then the third line is revealed. He summons this revelation by raising a deficiency from the left line to the height of the right line, asking that the Creator reveal His greatness to him in response to this request. He wants to reveal the Creator’s greatness, the greatness of bestowal, only so that it will allow him to work with the desire that was revealed in him in bestowal, “above reason.”

His egoistic desire surrenders to the greatness of bestowal that is revealed and agrees to work under the domination of the Creator. This means that a person builds his “head of the spiritual Partzuf,” where he calculates things that enable him to bestow in order to bestow and to receive in order to bestow.
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From the 1^st part to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/17/12, Shamati #11

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Question: It says that a person has to change himself internally, but where can he get the powers to do so?

Answer: We are not responsible for our internal desires of course, but we can influence them by external actions. This is flattery and a lie of course, but by annulling myself externally, I attain my internal self-annulment.

It is because I am doing this on purpose, wanting it to happen. So my actions are considered a prayer, a request for help, MAN, because I really want to impress myself by them.

This is why it is so helpful to actually humiliate yourself before the friends and this kind of work summons internal changes. A person is afraid to annul himself and to remain mindless and lose his own opinions, to lose his “self,” all his life experience and the perspective of life he has established. If he still thinks this, it is a sign that he hasn’t reached the recognition of his real humility, and hasn’t realized that there is no way he can succeed by himself.

He has not despaired of his own powers and so it is too soon for him to deal with this kind of work. He will have to wait a few more years, until eventually he will realize that nothing helps and all he has to do is to erase everything in him and to receive what his friends have.

He doesn’t know what they have, but he only knows that what they have is exactly what he needs and that he wants to get rid of what is in him.

Then a person begins to see that actually there was nothing in him but a little pride and concern for his ego. In fact all of spirituality, the whole upper level is external to him.
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From the 1^st part to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/15/12, Writings of Rabash

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