Question: When a situation occurs, I know that the Creator sends it for my good. I consciously react for the benefit of my friends, but there is a part of me that is hurt by this. Am I doing the right thing?
Answer: You must understand that it will always give you pain in order to make it clear where you still are. The spiritual Partzuf constantly is in contradictory properties.
There is an egoistic desire in Malchut. Due to the impact on Malchut of the upper light from the first nine Sefirot, it can divide itself into the part with which it relates to the first nine Sefirot (the properties of bestowal) and into the part that it cannot attribute to these properties. Thus, it is divided into two parts.
The part that relates itself to the properties of bestowal is the corrected part in Malchut. And the part that is under the restriction (Tzimtzum), we have no right to use. Although we would like to do this, we refuse because the use would be for its own sake. This is how we operate.
This contradiction always exists in man. It is this that gives him the opportunity to measure and understand where he is, at what stage, in what state. We cannot have the experience of only light or only darkness. This is the way out of all sensations. Either full light or full darkness is the same thing. A vessel (Kli) is a desire that can graduate, measure, and weigh itself.
So don’t worry, go ahead. We do not need to think at all about the states we are in. The main thing for us is to quickly realize all these states, process them in ourselves, and move on from one to another. That’s all. The main thing is acceleration.
From the International Convention “Rising Above Ourselves” 1/6/22, “Approaching the Creator Through the Network of Connections Between Us” Lesson 1