A person comes to the very gate leading to the spiritual world and at the last moment retreats. It is because this gate opens only if you accept the conditions of the upper. As long as you only approach it, you can stand them to some extent, but you cannot totally cut yourself off from the past and agree to take a step into the future. It is because this gate is the border between the past and the future, and so you go back.
Question: What do we lack at that moment?
Answer: There is a lack of mutual support, the force of the support of the environment. We can only evoke the Creator and force Him to act by mutual support. You cannot go through the gate without the help of the environment, without being pushed from behind and without others asking for you.
Going through the gate to the spiritual world means to connect with other vessels in order to discover together among us the reality that exists beyond that gate. We open this door between us, so it is impossible to manage without the support of others!
This support depends on the extent to which I can evoke the friends. They exist and support me only to the extent that I evoke them since they are the parts of my own soul. It only seems that they have freewill and that someone acts against me. All this is given to me so that I will correct myself and attain their support for that. In order to do that I have to subdue my ego—these are the rules of this game.
It is a theater where together with me there are also different actors on the stage: some seem like my friends and others as enemies, some love me and some hate me. With their help and by different means, I have to bring my ego to correction.
But in fact they don’t exist; they come out only so that I will perform my actions with regard to them. At one time I treat them as my friends and once as my enemies. This means that I perceive them “within reason.” Another time I work “above reason” and accept this as the Creator’s game. The whole Torah stems from the combination of these two perspectives.
From the 1st Part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/14/13, Writings of Baal HaSulam