We constantly go through opposite states since basically there is a desire to receive with all its egoistic attitude, understanding, and feeling. The Creator’s desire, however, is a desire to bestow, and it is opposite from our desire.
We don’t know what this opposite attribute means for us; we don’t know it. We only feel how it operates on us even if we don’t know what it is and who it is. We still have to clarify this. This is why this world was created in which instead of the Creator we are surrounded by different forms and creatures that seemingly influence us instead of Him.
We have to show understanding towards them; that it isn’t them who operate on us, but rather the upper force who is behind all of that turning to us through different people or through different events in life. I have to accept these actions and these influences as essential, in order to mold me, like dough, and to create the right form that is ready to be baked.
If I accept these things and try to find the powers to cope with the Creator’s work on me, I begin to know Him through this work, and His hands that hug me like dough.
Thus I go through two phases: First I agree and am ready that He should perform all the necessary work on me. I feel the strong pressure of His hands on me, like on a piece of dough, until He molds me correctly, in the form of bestowal, the level of Bina“, to bestow in order to bestow.”
I am ready for anything, as long as the Creator shapes me in this from. It is very hard for me, since as He works on me, He applies strong pressure. Then I want to go on, even to the state of to receive in order to bestow, in order to ascend and to rise like yeast. This means that the desire to receive itself already participates in this motion and yearns for the form that the Creator shapes him into. Thus we attain an equivalence of form with the Creator. To bestow in order to bestow is called “Matzah,” and to receive in order to bestow is called “Hametz” (leavened food), the real bread that in its corrected form joins the Creator’s form that is imprinted in the created being.
But first all our work is to accept all the forms that come to us that imprint the attribute of bestowal in us and to accept them as desirable. In order to do that, we should use the help of the environment as much as we can and all the means that were given to us in order to prepare ourselves for the receiving the Creator’s bestowal, His work on a person.
It may seem to a person that he does that, but if he doesn’t use the external support that is meant especially for that, then it is only an illusion that he is advancing towards accepting the upper forms, but in fact, he is not ready yet to become a spiritual embryo.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/11/13, Shamati #15