What The Other Wants

Dr. Michael LaitmanBaal HaSulam, “A Speech for the Completion of The Zohar”: Who is the Almighty, all His deeds are to bestow and to benefit the other, and not at all for His own benefit because He, the blessed, has no lack that needs to be fulfilled, and also he has no one from whom to receive, also you, all your deeds will be to bestow and benefit the other.

Question: What does it mean “to bestow and to benefit the other”?

Answer: It means that I need to feel exactly what you want. And for that I need to be in love towards you, in an inclination toward you. Meaning, I need to do a “Tzimtzum (restriction)” upon myself and to assemble on all my desires a “Masach (screen)” and “Ohr Hozer (Returning Light).” Then in my qualities, that will be directed outward and not inward to myself, I might be able to understand and to feel you and reveal precisely what you want.

I need to receive all your “tastes” from you even though I don’t recognize them. And for me, you are some kind of alien that came from another planet. Still, I take upon myself your vessels in such a form I even receive what your mother fed you in your childhood.

How is it possible to feel this in my vessels, my desires, if I have no idea what you are made from and what inner reaction you feel toward anything? Here I really need to come closer to you, to love you. In the wisdom of Kabbalah we call it “nearing,” embracing,” “kissing,” “coupling,” and “adhesion”; these are concepts that symbolize measurement of connection through equivalence of desires and mutual fulfillments.

Question: I mean, what seems to me now that the other is lacking something, is it only how it seems to me?

Answer: You cannot interpret your needs in your current vessels. Yes it is true that in our world the means of communication and the influence of the environment make it possible somehow to bring the desire into a common denominator, but to really feel what is in the heart of the friend is the same as to feel the Creator. You need to make a Tzimtzum, Masach, and Ohr Hozer. Only in this way will you feel him as yourself and only in this way will you be able to exit toward the other.
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/31/13, Writings of Baal HaSulam

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