Answer: First, we are not speaking about love for someone close to you, not about your beloved, but rather about someone who is totally “neutral” towards you to begin with. Then we begin to connect because of a common spiritual goal that cannot be attained without a mutual connection.
On the way to reaching the goal, you feel mutual aversion, until it becomes real hatred. You work on this hatred by feeling the “hardening of the heart” each time, by sometimes evoking love and then hating one another again. You experience constant ascents and descents and what is more, you mainly feel aversion and hatred.
You are constantly trying to enter the “niche” of indifference that allows you at least to keep the external framework, although it doesn’t lead to anything. This is the worst state, the “dead” state, when the friends don’t decide to get close to one another because they are afraid to discover hatred. But without hate it is impossible to advance towards love, and only the indifference remains.
Eventually you decide that you understand that there is no other choice: “I have to close my eyes no matter what and decide to go for love.”
Question: But what forces and motivates me?
Answer: You want to attain the goal. This desire forces you and motivates you if you are not deceiving yourself, of course. If you are deceiving yourself, you are simply wasting your time. So do some soul searching: Do you want to attain the goal, which means the Creator, the attribute of bestowal? If you do, then the friends and group have been prepared for you, invest in them. And if you don’t, then go home.
We mustn’t give in to routine, and you mustn’t accept the fact that tomorrow and the day after tomorrow will all be just like today. What do you expect? The upper Light is in a state of absolute rest, and it is only by our desires, in our vessels, that we can change reality. Nothing will happen if we don’t act. Israel has no “fortune.” Whoever follows the path of Yashar—El (straight to the Creator) is actually building his own “fortune,” the Light that drips and pours from Above.
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/16/12, “The Wisdom of Kabbalah and Philosophy”