The very first step in attaining love and bestowal is to achieve fear. This is much like a mother who is constantly in a state of fear, worrying about her baby and everything that happens to it. This natural fear constantly throbs inside of her and does not allow her to rest.
We need to reach the same attitude and concern regarding the Creator; that is, to constantly worry and quiver, checking ourselves: Am I thinking about Him, can I add anything else to my concern for Him? If I want to achieve the quality of Bina, then whoever I wish to bestow to is like my child. The fact that I call Him the Creator is irrelevant. I must worry and care for Him like I would about my own baby because I want to be a giver.
From this point a person’s connection with the Creator begins. However, in order for this to happen, we need to achieve the same tender connection with humanity, or at least with a small part: our group. I need to learn to worry about it like I would worry about someone that I love and cherish. We are given similar examples in our world: concern for our children or parents, for someone who is outside of me but is still connected to me with inseparable ties.
An inner fear or trepidation needs to live inside me: Will I be able to help them and bring them good? This is the quality of Bina from which everything begins, and, above it, we begin to build bestowal and love. The Creator gives us such exercises in our egoism so that we can gradually attain a different reality – an altruistic one. This is so we can have examples and a foundation on which to build the quality of Bina, bestowal, within us.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 7/22/10, Article, “You Stand Today, All of You”