The Inner Work Of A Kabbalist: “Concerning Love Of Friends” – 05.23.10

Dr. Michael LaitmanArticle, “Concerning Love of Friends:”

1. Why do I need love of friends?

Love of friends is the connection among souls.

“I” is my soul, a “friend” is a different soul, but love is the kind of connection between us whereby he becomes more important to me than I am to myself, and, accordingly, I’m more important to him than he is to himself. I have to feel his desires as closer than my own. This is called loving the other as you love yourself.

However, loving the other does not mean feeling the material desires of our world and serving them; rather, it means uniting our desires to attain the Creator. I am building a totally new spiritual construction, the common soul of Adam HaRishon, which has never existed before and which is above all corporeality.

2. Why did I choose these particular friends, and why did they choose me?

Did I really pick these friends? The force from Above has led me to this group. So where does my free will begin? We build our free choice every day, constantly checking why we need to unite with friends:

a.) Do I see in them, and they in me, the point in the heart, that is, the desire to unite and achieve adhesion with the Creator?

b.) What connection should be established in order to discover Him among us according to the law of the equivalence of form?

3. Should each friend openly express his love or it is enough that it is concealed in his heart?

Every one must openly express his love for the group. By doing so, he will increase the love in his friends’ hearts and will be impressed by them. If previously he had only his individual power of love for friends, now he will receive the powers from all the friends in the group.

One must always remember the purpose of the group which is to merge with the Creator.

A Kabbalistic group is founded on love of friends because it is the springboard for attaining the love of the Creator. That is why we must show each other examples of love of another.

4. Is it necessary to know what each friend lacks in order to fill him, or is it enough to love friends in general?

It is enough to love friends in general so as to assure that a friend does not lack motivation, support on the path, inspiration, and the feeling of how important the Creator and the group are, and to provide him with all this to the best of one’s ability.

From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/23/10, Article “Concerning Love of Friends”

Full Summary of the Article

1. Why do I need love of friends?

Love of friends is the connection among souls.

“I” is my soul, a “friend” is a different soul, but love is the kind of connection between us whereby he becomes more important to me than I am to myself, and accordingly, I’m more important to him than he is to himself. I have to feel his desires as closer than my own. This is called loving the other as you love yourself.

However, loving the other does not mean feeling the material desires of our world and serving them; rather, it means uniting our desires to attain the Creator. When our desires unite together into one, big desire which would be sufficient in strength and bestowing in quality (similar to the property of the Creator), then it becomes the force for discovering the Creator like a third party that dwells in our connection, among us.

Therefore, the questions arise:

а.) Why do I need the love of friends? Is it to attain the Creator?

b.) Am I aware that I cannot reach this objective on my own but only thanks to friends?

c.) Friends are those whom I care about more than myself. In our connection, I discover the property of bestowal where the Creator reveals Himself to me. This means that I am building a totally new spiritual construction, the common soul of Adam HaRishon, which has never existed before and which is above all corporeality.

2. Why did I choose these particular friends, and why did they choose me?

Did I really pick these friends? The force from Above has led me to this group. So where does my free will begin?

We build our free choice every day, constantly checking why we need to unite with friends:

a.) Do I see in them, and they in me, the point in the heart, that is, the desire to unite and achieve adhesion with the Creator?

b.) What connection should be established in order to discover Him among us according to the law of the equivalence of form?

3. Should each friend openly express his love or it is enough that it is concealed in his heart?

Every one must openly express his love for the group. By doing so, he will increase the love in his friends’ hearts and will be impressed by them. If previously he had only his individual power of love for friends, now he will receive the powers from all the friends in the group.

If, however, he doesn’t reveal his love to them, he won’t be able to receive their powers. Everyone will think that he himself is the only righteous one who loves his friends and the others don’t love him. He will be judging friends and will remain merely with his own little power. Hence, love has to be open and not concealed.

One must always remember the purpose of the group which is to merge with the Creator.

Otherwise, the body (desire) immediately forgets about the spiritual goal (fulfillment, bestowal) and begins to think about its egoistical gain (about what profit it can get from the love of friends and the Creator).

Therefore, each moment, one has to keep himself in check regarding his attitude to the Creator, to the group (the vehicle to attain Him), to the friend, and to studying.  That is, everything should be evaluated pursuant to the ultimate goal.

A Kabbalistic group is founded on love of friends because it is the springboard for attaining the love of the Creator (which is its goal). This is why I need a friend, in order to bestow onto him. If I need friends in order to receive from them, such a group will only cultivate my egoism.

A friend has to show me how much he desires to become giving and to annul himself, and do so silently through his attitude to studying and the group. Then, my original power to attain bestowal will increase according to the number of friends. But if the others don’t show me their love, then gradually, I will lose even the power that I had and will drown in love of myself. That is why we must show each other examples of love of another.

4. Is it necessary to know what each friend lacks, in order to fill him, or is it enough to love friends in general?

It is enough to love friends in general so as to assure that a friend does not lack motivation, support on the path, inspiration, and the feeling of how important the Creator and the group are, and to provide him with all of this to the best of one’s ability.

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