Question: We have to reach a deficiency for the desire to bestow in the Arava convention…

Answer: We don’t need anything but that. It seems that this is only half way, but in fact, it is half of the coin, the other half of which is provided by the upper one. It is enough for us to desire to unite so as to reach mutual bestowal in order to bestow upon the Creator.

We call it “a need for a deficiency.” But we don’t feel a desire to attain unity yet so that thereby we could bestow upon the Creator. Therefore, we build a compound deficiency made of a double filling. We do not intend to settle for a need for a deficiency so as to feel this deficiency during the next convention.

The need for connection will bring us to bestowal in the group. And there is another need: to bestow upon the Creator. Both relate to the same intention.

Question: We have to yearn for perfecton and this will provide us with the right desire. How can we make sure that the picture of perfection doesn’t hide the need for a deficiency from us?

Answer: We want to attain the desire to bestow in order to unite. Thereby we can carry on our desire to bestow upon the Creator and to reach adhesion with Him. One way or the other, it is all dressed on one “skewer” and is on one line. You shouldn’t draw any differences here. Think about this a little and you will see that there is no problem here.

If you mention the word “bestowal,” you continue to draw the line towards the Creator, without stopping on the way. Bestowal requires connection with the friends because only that will summon the reforming Light that brings the attribute of bestowal. Why do we all need this attribute? Do we need it in order to have a nice beastly life? No. It is in order to reach bestowal upon the Creator. Why do we need to bestow upon the Creator? Perhaps He doesn’t need it at all? No, He has no such deficiency. Our goal is to reach adhesion with Him because by that we bring Him contentment. We please the Creator not by bestowal, but rather by adhesion.

Question: How can we tie a need for a deficiency with a need for adhesion?

Answer: We need the influence of the Surrounding Light so that we will understand that bestowal is the solution for all the problems. It brings us to everything we want to attain. I want to desire to connect and this is what I ask of the Creator, of the Light that Reforms. But what for?

I want to desire to connect in order to reach adhesion with the Creator. This adhesion is part of my way, part of the calculation. Therefore, the plea cannot be whole if the three elements are not welded into it: Israel, the Torah, and the Creator. This is the nature of our desires, and we only need to understand it. Then you will see: You need to add the Creator to your plea. Otherwise there is no reason to connect in our world. You don’t want it, you didn’t come to study Kabbalah in order to connect with others in social protest.

Therefore, when you discover your desire fully, you reach the formula: “Israel, the Torah, and the Creator are one.” Just part of the sentence, part of the clarification isn’t enough. When we go out to the desert, we cannot cut our request in the middle of the sentence. If the request is whole, it must end with the word about the Creator because it is from Him that you get the power to perform changes, the power of the reason, awareness, and understanding. Everything comes only from this source, and so our requests have to end with it.

Otherwise, it is like sending a letter with no addressee. If you do that, no matter what you write, you will clearly get no reply and the letter will be lost mid-way.
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From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/14/2011, “Introduction to The Study of the Ten Sefirot” 

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There is nothing but the soul, the one “round” desire to receive, that is full of Light. The Light begins to operate inside; it spurs the desire and “warms it up,” puts it out of balance, and is revealed to it gradually. Throughout the process, the Lights and the vessels influence one another and descend from Ein Sof (Infinity).

Let’s take a system, any system, mechanical, electrical, or hydraulic. If it receives an electric shock, it is put out of balance in “one blow,” and begins to gradually quiet down until it returns to the previous balanced state.

This is what happened with Malchut of Ein Sof: the system received a “blow” when it discovered the contrast between the Light and the vessel, the horrible gap between the infinite minus (vessel) and the infinite plus (Light). This nightmare is terrible for the desire, and it cannot bear and digest this. Therefore it restricted itself and moved on to the next chain of actions. The desire won’t calm down until it performs them. After the decision that has been taken in Ein Sof, all the other decisions come automatically, all the way from top down, until our world.

Now our work begins; the work of ascending back to Ein Sof. The way back totally matches the descent that preceded it: We go through the same stages, but in an opposite order and according to our will, as we request the correction (MAN) first. This is the whole difference.
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From the 4^th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/12/12, “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot”

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Question: What do I have to do if I realize that when I am praying for my friends I am in fact praying for myself?

Answer: This is called “Lo Lishma.” You think of others because without them you can achieve nothing. It is an egoistic intention since you pray for everybody else only because you can’t manage without them. So, this means that you are really praying for yourself, “Lo Lishma.”

We pray to get closer to the Creator and to “bestowal.” But do we clearly realize what bestowal is? For us, bestowal is a pleasant sensation, some kind of positive acquisition, a present!

Does it have anything in common with actual bestowal? No, it doesn’t. It’s a lie, but with good intention. So far, we sense that concealment is given to us from Above to make us think of various spiritual concepts as if we were little children. A child looks at each garbage truck with delight thinking that it’s God’s chariot that descended from the skies; he regards its driver as an angel and envies him.

The deceit is organized by nature so that a child learns to respect anything that is higher than him and thus learns to strive and achieve an upper level, otherwise he won’t grow. The same scenario works with all of us: We have to worship the group because only with its help can we achieve the spiritual world and attain bestowal.

We regard bestowal as a process of giving to us, rather than our giving to others! This is how we view bestowal; if not for that, we would have run away a long time ago. However, the force Above overturns the deceit completely and presents it to us in a totally opposite way, thus making us wait for a present. Sweet treats stimulate our growth.

Therefore, our current concepts are wrong; they are the reverse side of reality. That’s why our world is called “opposite” and deceitful. When we advance towards spirituality, we become opposite to it. But those who lead regular lives are not considered opposite to spirituality whatsoever; they are simply cut from it.

We are aware of our oppositeness to spirituality since we educate ourselves. We try to be in control of our divergence as much as possible by restricting ourselves. If we can understand where actual truth is and where deception is and if we manage to expand the boundaries of sanctity by giving up on something we like, then to the extent of our efforts we will advance.

Everything depends on the degree to which we are able to give correct sensory definitions to spiritual concepts in order to start sensing bestowal, in other words to start realizing that for us it is similar to death and that there is nothing worse than that.

It’s even worse than death, since death is a complete discontinuation after which there is nothing at all, whereas here our lives are taken away from us and we become the Creator’s slaves; we can only torture ourselves from morning till night by working hard against our own will; we can neither compliment our egoism nor die.

It is opposite to such an extent that one cannot even imagine it. Oppositeness unfolds only when we acquire the property of Bina, the readiness to suffer until that suffering turns into the opposite of its opposite state: into love.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/26/12, The Zohar

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Question: What conditions should we fulfill so our request is accepted by the upper one?

Answer: The request should match the abilities of the lower one. If a small child asks according to his conditions and makes efforts, then he grows by getting the answer, illumination. Besides that, we aren’t required to do anything else but to ask according to our degree, our internal state and external conditions, which are given to us.

We need to consider both the internal and external conditions. We think only about ourselves, but it is wrong; we should take into account the entire world, all the conditions. So it works in the material world, and in the spiritual one.

In the spiritual world, the soul is an internal component, and the worlds are the external one. If the souls do not bring themselves in balance with the external system, the worlds, then no action is possible. We still do not understand this in our world, and I am sometimes amazed when I hear from some students that they are not concerned about dissemination, the connection with the world.

But what is the world? It is our external vessels. You cannot address the upper one correctly without considering both the internality and externality.
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From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/9/12, “Study of the Ten Sefirot”

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In Kabbalah, as compared to other sciences, it isn’t enough for a person to simply study and understand the studied material, even if he feels it in a regular, commonly accepted manner. The uniqueness of the wisdom of Kabbalah is that a person feels internal changes in it. Actually, he changes the foundations of his desire, mind, and heart. A new desire is revealed to him, consisting of 613 desires and 613 connected and corresponding thoughts enabling the realization of the desired. In general, these desires and thoughts comprise the person’s soul. That is what the studies reveal to us.

Before that, a person only had a point, the smallest Reshimo (informational gene) existing in him from previous stages of development, which we’ll attain afterward. In all our work, the only thing that can facilitate our self-development is drawing and increasing the force of the Light influencing the point concealed within us to the maximum, developing it as quickly as possible.

That doesn’t mean we can just turn on the faucet so the Light will flow more quickly. In order to hasten our development, we need to be prepared to change.

We don’t hold a knob in our hands, which regulates the Light coming from the Creator to the Menorah. I can only turn that knob from within the point in my heart. Try to discern if the point in your heart is connected to the switch. You don’t control it, and the only option is to be included in a group. That is because in this system, comprehensive and abstract Light from Infinity flows. Thus, in order to regulate it, there must be a total (∑), integral (∫) of efforts, reaching infinity. Only by being included in all the friends further and further, will I be able to turn the switch and increase the Light in accordance with the law of equivalence of form.

What is that law? I’m not in equivalence of form with the switch, the absolute force of the Creator. However, at my degree, I can operate it to a certain extent. The difference (∆) between us remains, and some sort of adaptation or equivalence exists in all.

Question: Is this switch personal for each one or common to all?

Answer: Common. What operates is only the prayer of many, the common desire.

Question: How can we create a permanent connection between the point and the switch?

Answer: It’s impossible. Because being permanent symbolizes lack of motion, in such a case you won’t develop. You will always be driven away from the path by evil desires.

In the “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot,” Item 17, Baal HaSulam brings the words of the Talmud: “If thou cometh across this villain, pull him to the Beit Midrash (seminary),” to a place where we all demand the Creator, meaning a group, the collective force concealed amongst the friends.
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From the 4^th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/7/12, “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot”

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Question: How can I ask for help if I don’t feel where it can be requested?

Answer: That’s true. But does the baby who has just been born and cries feel whom he’s calling? He just screams.

That’s called concealment. I am situated in the upper Light. This upper Light doesn’t depict any image of reality to me, as yet. Imagine a baby who has just now emerged from his mother’s womb: He is simply content or not. Besides that, he doesn’t feel anything. He doesn’t feel the reality surrounding him.

That’s how we are: We’re content or not. From where and why, that we don’t feel. Afterward, we begin to recognize this world, become familiar with it, and respond to it; hence, we begin to develop.

In spirituality, we develop in the same manner in our relationship with the Creator. Now, I don’t feel it, understand it, or know anything about it, whether it exists or not. Yet, the Kabbalists tell me: Pay attention to what’s taking place behind the scene of this world before you. Indeed, this world is situated before you in order to begin to develop the connection with the Creator through it. The Creator created you in such a way so you’d cling less to this imaginary reality. It is imaginary, because instead of the Creator, instead of the upper force, you depict something inside you in the meantime. Different waves of liquids paint the image of reality for you, like in a dream. That’s why it has been said about this world: “We were as dreamers.” Indeed, a dream also seems true to you. It’s the same thing now, as well.

Hence, in order to awaken and emerge from this dream, this bubble, we need the reforming Light, the spiritual force. Does it exist or not altogether? I don’t know, I don’t feel it. I’m told: “Would you like to try? Be my guest, you have the opportunity; you have been given this world along with the means through which you’ll be able to begin to feel something above this world. Would you like to use this means? Go ahead! You don’t? Try to turn down receiving it. Just like you reached this means against your will, with no choice, out of pressure of all sorts of physical or emotional misery, that is how you can also attempt to escape.”

However, we see how all of humanity is gradually advancing and can’t escape. Why? What is this crisis? It’s being revealed to humanity that there is no choice other than revealing the comprehensive system, the force governing and activating all, the upper force.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/7/12, The Zohar

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It doesn’t matter how much a person understands where he is or in what state; those states also continuously change according to his degree. The higher we ascend, the more frequently the states shift, and within each one of us there are also ascensions, descents, and different fluctuations in equivalence with the degree in which we’re situated.

That’s why it doesn’t matter in what state or degree or instance we’re in; rather, it’s important to request assistance. That is because all the changes arrive only through the reforming Light. I can be like a baby who doesn’t understand anything and has no perception of what’s being done to me: They perform all kinds of surgery, actions, and treatments upon me, give me a little food, and force me to do something. In general, those are confusing and unpleasant states, in which there are more questions than answers. Yet, the reforming Light must give me an answer for everything. I have nowhere else to turn, no one to ask for anything, only It.

This Light is concealed in our bond, in the center of the unity of people longing for the Light. It is amongst them. To the extent they want to be included in that Light that exists amongst them, they reveal It.

That’s why we’re going out to the desert, secluded far from the rest of the world, and want to attain internal concentration.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/7/12, The Zohar

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Hochma and Bina can be in four states (as well as Partzufim Aba and Ima in the world of Nekudim):

1. Back to back (Achor be-Achor): no Light of Hochma and no need (from downward or upward) for Hochma and Bina to be connected.

2. Face to back (Panim be-Achor): there is Hochma in Aba, but Ima has no need to receive it;

3. Back to face (Achor be-Panim): Ima needs the Light of Hochma while Aba doesn’t have it.

4. Face to face: (Panim be-Panim): Aba desires to bestow, and Ima desires to receive the Light of Hochma in order to pass it to the lower ones.

The state “Face” means handing over the Light of Hochma; “Back” means connection solely in Hassadim or the lack of connection.

Face to back is a constant state in the world of Nekudim, when there is Hochma in Aba but Ima is unwilling to receive it. This state can be permanent since it doesn’t result in breaking. This state can continue in the world of Atzilut, like during the preparation stage, in the state of anticipation (standby mode).

The system is ready, and as soon as a desire to be corrected is raised by the broken souls, Aba and Ima’s adhesion (Zivug) immediately occurs, thereby passing down the Light from Above. But MAN, a plea, the prayer of the lower ones, is mandatory. It serves as an agent opening the so-called faucet holding back the flow of the Light, and it starts streaming downward.

This can be likened to a transistor to which the appropriate voltage is applied (MAN), and then the electric current flows. No matter what systems we are discussing, be they mechanical or electronic, thoughts or desires, the principle remains.

A state in which the system stands by is regarded as face to back. Aba turns its face to Ima, who turns its back. But as soon as MAN, the lower one’s desire, rises up, it affects Ima, which turns to Aba, followed by their adhesion (Zivug) in the state of face to face, and the Light of Hochma passes downward to the souls.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/20/10, “Study of the Ten Sefirot”

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We are in a state where precisely the “prayer of the pauper” can save us. This means that a person has nothing and he does not need anything, besides one thing – to revive his soul. He does not ask for anything beyond this.

We are going out to the desert, which reflects our inner state, because the desert is poverty. And we don’t desire anything, other than to acquire the point of contact with the Creator, to revive our soul.
In return we can receive all the benefits of our current level, instead of the drop of unity with the higher level, which is always called the Creator for the lower level, creation.

We lack desire for the higher level, a desire just to unite with the upper one, to feel that we are inside of Him like a drop of semen that begins to develop.

This should be our intention while reading The Book of Zohar.
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From the 2nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/6/12, The Zohar

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The wisdom of Kabbalah only speaks of inner work, correction of the soul, revealing the Creator to the created, and all the images in its stories constitute different types of desire through which we view the world. The desire to bestow is called Israel, (Yashar-El, straight to the Creator). “Israel in exile” is the desire to bestow with an intention of self-benefit. “Nations of the world” are the egoistic desire to receive.

If the desire “Israel” is in exile, its intent becomes egoistic, meaning it becomes bestowal with the intent of “in order to receive.” Hence, Israel in exile can gain much greater benefit than the “Egyptians,” than the regular desires to receive. That is why it has been said that after the sons of Israel descended to Egypt, they multiplied, became rich, fattened, became important, and had plenty of onions, garlic, meat, and fish.

In other words, all desires received the filling they wanted. After all, they were working in bestowal in order to receive: They used the force of bestowal to benefit egoistically. And of course, they succeed more than “the nations of the world.” As it written, the nation of Israel mingled with the other nations, learned their ways, and achieved greater success because they know how to use bestowal even in order to receive.

That is why it is very difficult to exit the ego; it requires special work. A unique force is required to extract the egoistic desire to bestow from Egypt, the desire which is so advantageous to Pharaoh who can’t receive the same from his own people:  the simple, egoistic will to receive.

Israel on the other hand, work for their own benefit, using the spiritual force to fill their corporeal desires. Surely, the ego doesn’t want to lose them; they become the primary means for receiving its fulfillment, which can’t be received from anything else. Nothing can provide such great fulfillment.

And so, how can Israel’s desires become disconnected from the ego? They have to undergo two corrections because they work in bestowal with the intention of in order to receive, not just the Egyptians (the desire to receive), rather the will to bestow, which learned from them, hence, it fell even lower than Egypt. Egypt doesn’t have the option of using the force of bestowal for egoistic fulfillment.

Everything begins from the moment the Egyptian king dies and those desires that worked in bestowal for self-benefit suddenly stopped feeling fulfillment in that way. There’s nothing to work for any more; our king died, disappeared! That means, I stop feeling why I’m studying and working. I don’t see the reward any longer. And then, “And Israel cried out from the work.”

At first, we knew the purpose of our work; we worked hard and gained egoistically. We were faithful slaves of the ego and wanted nothing beyond that. And now, all of a sudden, hard work begins without the clarity of knowing why.  We don’t feel the purpose in egoistic bestowal: That is help arriving to us from Above. The development reaches a state in which we’re incapable of enjoying that, we cry out in desperation and then begin to search.

Indeed, if there’s nothing to enjoy, “This life is worse than death.” There’s no life, no sense of fulfillment. And if there’s no pleasure, a person is prepared to commit suicide, rather than feel the emptiness. Then the work of exiting Egypt begins, which lasts “many days.”
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From the 1^st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/5/12, Shamati #159

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