Until the Light Changes Us
Question: If I try to convey the awareness of the importance of the goal, the Creator, to a friend ,what am I actually doing?
Answer: You come to the group and say: “Friends, you must constantly give me a sense of the greatness of the Creator.” Saying this is not difficult and costs nothing. From your ego you pressure them. They are an external force from which you can demand.
From yourself you cannot demand, but from them you can. “I want you to give me the awareness of the greatness of the Creator.” They begin to give it to you, and then you yield to their influence.
Question: But then am I again moving toward pleasure?
Answer: Yes, because the group convinces you, since you are built in such a way that you submit to the opinion of society. Naturally, you derive pleasure from joining the common opinion. It gives you confidence, a sense of belonging, but all this is still measured within vessels of reception.
And then you begin to strive after the greatness of the Creator: “It is worthwhile for me to be near Him.” But you do not see these pleasures, because if you did, you would strive for them yourself. Since you do not see them, you need the group to tell you that it is worthwhile.
Gradually, through this, you evoke the surrounding light, which indeed changes you. The action is not performed by us, but we must provide the means for it. The Creator is concealed and not needed by me, yet the group says that He is needed, and it seems to me that it is so. I do not know who He is or what He is, but somehow, I perform an action, according to which the surrounding light comes to me, and it is what performs the work.
Everything is done detached from the desire to receive, which, during these actions, feels nothing. There is no concrete benefit. If someone from the outside asks you: “What do you gain from this?”, you can answer: “Your life is no better.” Or say: “I receive pleasure from exploring reality. I have something beyond your animal level.” But do you have anything tangible? No.
This is a sign that we are advancing correctly without the interference of the desire to receive, until the surrounding light changes us. There is no other way, no other means. Therefore, each time we find ourselves in a kind of despair, we have nothing to be proud of, the end is unknown, and where that Machsom is, is unclear.
On one hand, we accumulate some experience, but on the other hand, it gives us no foundation. And all of this is necessary in order to disconnect the desire to receive from the result, which in fact does not belong to it.
And so, it continues until I become satisfied with the existence of a certain “charm of holiness,” received from the surrounding light. I cannot do otherwise; I want it. The light builds this yearning within me.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/19/26, Rabash, “Concerning Hesed [Mercy]”
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