Question: When I lift a friend’s spirits, aren’t I adding satisfaction to his will to receive? And must he then somehow return this work to me?

Answer: The point is that everything depends on what your words are clothed in right now, on your intention when you praise a friend. I am not exalting him personally. I am exalting the idea of bestowal toward one another that exists in our group. By doing this, I educate the whole group and myself about how special and spiritual the act of bestowal is.

With the intention to praise a friend, by thanking him in front of the group, I must evoke a certain attitude toward the act of bestowal, not toward him personally. This should elevate all of us to the level of appreciating the importance of bestowal.

This is a problem we can observe in our ordinary daily life. I can give you something, and you will accept it with love because it feels good to you. But I can give you the same gift in such a form or with such an attitude that you will want to get rid of it at all costs. You will feel very bad. In other words, I can evoke all kinds of sensations in you through the very fact that I give you something.

We must clothe the praise of a friend in such an intention that I am elevating, not the friend, but the Creator who has given us the strength to act. Because if you had not received these forces from the Creator, you would not be able to do even something insignificant that is good toward me.

It turns out that for the sake of good relations between us, we turn, not to one another, but to the higher force that gives us the ability to do this.

First, the fuel, the intention within each of us directed toward bestowal, can be given only from above if we are worthy of it. By this we glorify the higher force, not ourselves.

Second, it becomes arranged in such a way that no matter how much you praise someone in the group, we cannot become proud of it, because the overall atmosphere is such that this simply cannot happen. We are occupied with advancement, not with looking at one another.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/24/26, Rabash, “Purpose of Society – 2”

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