Question: How do we strengthen the responsibility of every friend in regard to the mutual guarantee?
Answer: If the Light does not affect me to a sufficient extent and does not bring me to a state where I begin to care about the friend’s state, will I really think about him? Never! On the other hand, if I receive an awakening from the Light, suddenly I will feel such a desire. Either I have it or not. However, I need to contribute to having it.
Therefore, I do not eat myself up for not loving the friends. I don’t love them, don’t care about them, and don’t think about them because I am not connected to them. In order to change this state, I need the influence of the Light. If it affects me, I will think about others; if it doesn’t affect me, I won’t think about them. I need to determine exactly where and how I can cause a change.
Right now, I don’t love you, but the Light comes, and, suddenly, I do. Why is that? I don’t know; the Light does this. We only need to rouse its influence, and everything else is a consequence. However much desire, concern, and worry He gives me is how much I will have.
Hence, the most important concern is to awaken the Light, and this can happen only in the process of mutual studying. We await this phenomenon precisely from studying since there is no other means. During the studies, we think together, “When will the Light finally change and unite us?” This is the intention.
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 11/26/10, Talmud Eser Sefirot