We have acquired something big and precious during the Convention: We have discovered for the first time that Pharaoh is sitting inside us and hates us, and we have to get rid of him, to run away, to exit Egypt…but are incapable of it.
We would have never realized that we must run away from him. We hoped that we could reveal spirituality in our egoism, in “Egypt.” But we did not even think that this is “Egypt.” Yet now we are beginning to understand that we must break free from it.
Our egoism, Pharaoh, received a blow, and this disappointment passed through him. Now we see that we have to distance ourselves from the desire in which we reveal disappointment and bitterness.
However, had we not gone full out till the end, we would not have felt disillusionment; we would have sensed that, truly, something is stopping us. There is no middle ground in spirituality; we have to go till the end.
Hence, now a certain new sensation has manifested in us. That same disappointment, the force of suffering that we now feel (since I invested so much effort, had so many hopes, and nothing happened) is my Pharaoh, who received a beating and is now suffering.
However, the Pharaoh has to feel the beatings since otherwise we will not be able to run away from it. Indeed, we run only from evil.
If I reveal my egoistic desire, my nature as evil, I will want to escape from it. And, perhaps, I will have to experience more of such blows before I decide that I must do it. I literally have to come out of my skin, to exit my “body.” This is called that Pharaoh is receiving blows, the “ten plagues of Egypt.”
We achieved this only because we nevertheless united between us. One is always revealed against the other, as it is said, “in Your Light we will see the Light.” Thanks to this unification and our preparation, we realized that we suffer because of our egoistic nature. And this is a big achievement!
Millions of people who participated in the Convention virtually were together with us. They, too, went through the same states.
From the Lesson on the Weekly Torah Portion 11/12/10
Ascending To The First Level