In Darkness As In Light

Dr. Michael LaitmanThe Creator conceals Himself. But instead of tearing off the “cover” and revealing Him, I build His image in myself. The screen that He placed between us remains, but I make changes within myself which create in me the properties of the Creator, His image. Only in this way, having built His image within myself, can I see Him because by Himself, He is beyond any image.

In the darkness of my egoism, I build a shining image of the properties of bestowal and love, an image of the Light. The Creator remains just as hidden by the screen, but underneath the screen, I create His image as if He were standing before me. I shape the Light of bestowal (faith, Hassadim) and exist within it, not discovering the Creator on the other side of the screen.

I ask the Creator to not remove the concealing screen, but rather to allow me to exist in the shade, in darkness, so that the darkness will become like the Light for me and I will appreciate its importance. In fact, precisely because of it I am able to create out of myself similarity to the Creator, to become independent. Having hidden Himself, He has created a place for my similarity to Him. And to the measure of this similarity, the screen dividing us becomes transparent, and our images coincide.

The darkness helps me for otherwise the Light would fill me, nipping all aspirations in the bud. I would not feel the need for anything and would not be able to make any personal movement. In contrast to this, darkness creates a necessity for searching.

If the darkness simply dissipated, I would return to my usual, materialistic life. Because of this, I ask that the darkness will remain. It greatly helps my egoism: Nothing fills or calms it, so I will desire Light out of the darkness. I want to obtain the qualities of Light not merely by discovering the Creator, but by creating His image within myself.

I support the screen that divides us myself: The Creator gradually removes it, but I immediately raise the concealment to 100%. Thus, I build a canopy, the “roof of the tent,” as I am not willing to accept the Upper Light directly. Rejecting it, I obtain the property of bestowal and exist in darkness as in Light. For my egoism it is darkness, but for the giving intentions it is Light.
From the Hoshana Rabbah Night Lesson 9/29/10, Shamati #8

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