My Answer: You have to work in the group; you must oblige it to influence you. How can you oblige them? Buy them! As it is written: “Buy yourself a friend.”
You must invest yourself in the group in order to persuade the friends to have an impact on you. You need to annul your ego in regard to them because only the lower one receives from the greater.
Work in the group:
1. Influence your friends. Where you are greater than them, give them everything they want, as if you are bigger and able to bestow (like the greater bestows to the lower one) .
2. In the measure that you are lower, you must receive an awareness of the importance of the purpose of creation from them. You must annul yourself and receive from them.
You should say to the friends: “Whatever and in whatever quantity of it you desire, I bestow it to you, so that I can receive the awareness of the importance of bestowal and love from you. Only this I need from you. I have everything else, but this I cannot get anywhere else except from the group.”
Yet, I do not receive love and bestowal from them; from them I feel the sensation of a lack of it and the desire for it. Later, the Light arrives and brings me love and the quality of bestowal. I receive the desire for the quality of love and bestowal from the group; the Light that Reforms brings correction and replaces the sensation of lack.
From the 3rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 6/23/10, Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot