Question: What does it mean to proceed by the path of bestowal?

Answer: If the goal of creation is to bring pleasure to the creatures and the Creator is a positive force that does good, and only this is the essence of His treatment of us, then why do we need to pray for Him to do good to us?

Everyone screams out to the Creator, “Do something good to us!” But that is ridiculous! Why beg a kind person to perform an act of kindness toward me? He is already doing good; He cannot do anything else. After all, it is written that the Creator is benevolent to the good and the bad alike. He never changes His attitude, as it is written, “I did not change My HaVaYaH” and “the Light exists in absolute rest.”

That goes to show us that it is not worthwhile to ask Him for good. Yet all prayers, all requests, and psalms are composed by Kabbalists, people who exist in spiritual attainment. Then why did they pray, “Help me, save me, do for me”?

These are pleas to form the desire “Help me correct my perception!” That is called “the work of the Creator,” while for the Creator bestowing to us is not work, it’s pleasure.

My work is to ask for the right desire or vessel, and His work is to create this vessel. In other words, it is request for readiness to accept the fulfillment due to which we achieve adhesion rather than a request for a pleasant change.

The word “prayer” is translated as “self-judgment”; it is the creature’s request to be changed. When I ask, “Why have You forsaken me?” has He really left me? Or do I say this only in regard to my own perception within which I feel that He has left me and I realize this myself? In essence, I ask for Him to correct my sensation so that I would feel that He did not leave or become distant from me.

A prayer is a request for correction of our desires, and all this is called work for the Creator rather than fulfillment itself.
[66470]
From the 1^st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/15/12, Writings of Rabash

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Question: What can I do if a large part of my thoughts is devoted to material matters: how to earn money, my family, and  my position in the eyes of people, and I hardly think about spirituality?

Answer: This is great if you already know that all your thoughts are only about yourself and you do not agree with this, but cannot do anything. At this point you already have the opportunity to discover that there is one additional force besides yourself, the teacher, the group, and the whole world.

There is a hidden force, which creates this egoistic relationship between you and the others, and only it can change this relationship to the correct one.

You lack only a thought, a scrutiny: Is it necessary to change this relationship? Why do you need it? You do not have enough awareness of how much you want to win it and cannot think about anyone else but yourself, and that you cannot stand that you cannot overcome these thoughts. Then, from this inner feeling that has reached a huge tension, a cry is born, to which the reforming Light responds.
[66278]
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/13/12, Shamati #153

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There are many ways we can check our desire in which all the clarifications take place: “What for? Why? Where does it come from and where is it leading to? By what means can I advance? How can I check whether my goal is the right one? What are my true intentions? Could it be that it is simply my egoistic desire and personal interests that naturally attract me, and that everything that is against them repels me?”

A very close and thorough examination is needed here. At the same time we should be careful not to be too absorbed in these clarifications because it is part of my work, only half of the “half a Shekel” that is my part. The other half should be expressed in action. The action is studying together with the group, feeling the friends, and the examination during the study: Is it in the same line of thought with everyone else, in contact with the teacher and the group?

The second half of the “half a Shekel” ends when a person receives the change from Above. All our efforts should end in attaining an open deficiency that waits for salvation from Above, like Nukva, the female desire that opens herself to receive the correction.

This is how we should prepare ourselves for the lesson. Here a lot depends on the greatness of the source from which we receive this bestowal, from the immense height of The Book of Zohar and its authors. The mechanism that operates in The Book of Zohar is the world of Ein Sof because it passes the upper Light from the head of Zeir Anpin, the Light of Ein Sof.

If a person works on all the levels: in his feelings, his connection with the group, with the teacher, with the state of the world, with the systems of the worlds, with the upper force, and connects it all to the one mechanism that he operates now, then there is hope that his awakening and his action will evoke an awakening from Above. And his prayer (MAN) will draw the response (MAD) from Above.

The prayer (MAN) (Mei Nukvin – female waters) is the desire, the deficiency. The response that comes from Above is MAD (Mei Dhurin – male waters), the power to overcome. We have to feel that we turn the weak, meaningless, painful, and defective state into bestowal, power, and correction, and feel inside us how our MAN turns into MAD
[66049]
From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/11/12, The Zohar

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Hastening time, meaning hastening our actions regarding the “past,” “present” and “future,” gives us the feeling of life, the force of vitality. The more we stop and do not exert ourselves in the work on the part of the created being, there is more pressure put on us by the Creator’s work. This is similar to the way a hybrid car is built: if the battery is empty, the engine runs on fuel.

So we have to organize an environment for ourselves that will spur us to advance by our powers and not to wallow in time, which passes leaving no traces, as we lie to ourselves that everything is fine. If a person is not under pressure put on him by the environment and teacher, if he doesn’t feel that he lacks spiritual life, he cannot advance.

This pressure can be felt as good or bad. But we must clarify it for ourselves; we need to gladly accept any pressure that leads to clarification, connection, and more efficient work, and not be managed by pleasant or unpleasant feelings in our egoism.

If we want to advance, be a little more mature, and not remain tiny babies, we need to wake up. The awakening toward the goal isn’t perceived as pleasant, and we should accept this in faith above reason.

Unfortunately we are not kids who have a natural desire to grow, who passionately work building things with blocks, and who do not give up when everything falls down and is destroyed. We have to receive the same force that pushes a child to develop: We obtain it from the environment and studying.

If I feel that I lack this power, I have to come to the lesson with the desire, with the negative charge, with the feeling of everything I didn’t manage to do, and to ask for strength. If you don’t feel enough pressure on you to connect and to advance or to make the demand for this to the teacher and the group, you have a reason to come to the lesson. You have to come with the right demand, with a full list of everything you didn’t manage to do yesterday, and now you come with a broken heart demanding the powers for correction.
[66177]
From the 1^st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/12/12, Shamati #35

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Question: For quite some time now during The Zohar lesson I feel as if I am trying to find the right wave of a radio station, but I only hear noises. We constantly speak about the fact that while reading The Book of Zohar we should tune ourselves to one goal or another, and I can’t do that at all…am I missing something by that or should I just keep on going and it will come eventually?

Answer: The thing is that if we are talking about receiving a wave and not about the Reforming Light, then among all the noises I should find the exact frequency in which I will hear the silence; the silence is what I need to hear. This is the exact frequency of the station. According to the wisdom of Kabbalah this accurate direction indicates that I am getting ready to receive the Inner Light.

Here, however, we are talking about the Surrounding Light, about the Reforming Light, which you don’t recognize when it comes to you. You aren’t working here in order to receive some wisdom, to receive some “station” and to hear something new.

You are here in order to activate the maximum desire, and in it you will receive the power to overcome, not knowledge. After all, you are not looking for knowledge here, but for the desire to bestow, to annul yourself before the Upper, to adhere to Him, to His attribute of bestow, to the power of bestowal, to reach self sacrifice, and the ability to actually incorporate in the group in order to receive from it the power to find this upper spiritual mechanism there.

You are not tuning yourself to the “station” of wisdom. You don’t wait to be shown something like on a TV screen. This isn’t the channel through which the Reforming Light comes. It comes to the place in which you yearn for bestowal most and are ready to annul yourself and develop your connection with others. This is the result of the Reforming Light, which we should expect.

I don’t aspire to understand and to feel the material we study at all. I yearn to understand and feel the actions of bestowal themselves. After all, “to know the material studied,” as Baal HaSulam says in part 155, of the “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot,” means to know the Upper, and not to acquire knowledge. Knowledge in spirituality is the knowledge of bestowal, and it is in the Light that I study how the spiritual tool works. I won’t see it if I don’t have this approach.

After all, what does the Reforming Light bring us? It allows us to relate to the hidden world in which we dwell through the attribute of bestowal. When I begin to relate to the world using the attribute of bestowal, the world becomes transparent and through it I see the networks of connection. It is about these networks that I study, the networks in which I am incorporated, in which I begin to feel like a spider in a web.

When I feel the whole system of connection, I begin to correct it, to pull the strings that are drawn from me and to see upon what I bestow. Eventually, this is our whole study: about how I move the whole system and how with its help I correct my actions and work for this system, and how this whole system moves until the Creator, the general force, is revealed.

This is why I don’t look for the “station” that should be revealed by The Book of Zohar. But the “static” will gradually bring you to search for another “station,” and you will find it.
[66044]
From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/11/12, The Zohar

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Question: This weekend we will hold a “quiet Saturday.” What should this silence be?

Answer: This custom of being silent came into the world from none other than Kabbalists. It is used as an exercise in various practices which don’t relate to our path, and generally, in the field of psychology.

When a person wants to understand something new, to focus on something new, he needs solitude. He can run away from everyone to someplace, which would be physical solitude. Or he can find solitude within, where I find a certain space inside and hide there from others’ eyes, although physically I am surrounded by many people. This relates to all levels of a person.

So, we want to carry out a similar exercise, a “silent pledge” where we refrain from speaking. There are special periods when people study the Torah more, delve deeper into the material, observe various fasts. These methods pull a person out of the usual order, the routine, and help him look at the world and himself slightly differently. They allow him to concentrate or focus inside.

“A quiet Saturday” does not mean that no one opens their mouths. But when we do talk, we talk only about the study and what it contains. And we only talk inasmuch as it is necessary. If there is no need, then we think about the same questions instead of talking about them. After all, words lay bare a person’s soul, revealing the innermost secrets of his heart. And therefore, one shouldn’t talk unless it is for the sake of correction.

That is how we will hold this Saturday. All lessons and meals will take place by the regular schedule, and every person will limit himself as much as he can, trying not to speak but only to think.

Concentration in thought, inner focus has a much greater effect in the world than words. After all, thought is a much higher force than speech. This is the highest force in a person, and therefore it is the most effective in the general system of reality. It is precisely the beginning of the chain, “thought, speech, action”.

Therefore, we hope that by cutting conversations down to the minimum, we will rise to a higher level of bestowal.
[66033]
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/11/12, “The Freedom”

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Our evolution to become “human,” to resemble the Creator, takes place because I change my corporeal mind and feelings into upper spiritual ones. I want to resemble the Creator, to use my mind and feeling to resemble the upper force. Thus I make contact with the upper force, receive an external force, and start developing myself.

This is not the way it was on the inanimate, vegetative, and animate levels within a person when I worked only with my mind and heart and nothing but that. But to the extent I yearn for my heart and mind to resemble the upper, I receive forces from Him and I can demand that He change my feelings and mind.

This means that I don’t acquire life experience on this world’s level; I don’t change my desire by using my mind in order to sooner or later gain as the wise do in this world. Actually, I totally change the way I work.

I leave my beastly senses and mind at the level of basic necessity in order to provide me with the basic necessities in life and not more than that, and I start to develop a spiritual mind and feeling inside me. Spirituality means for the benefit of others.

Of course, this is totally different from what I had before and I have to start rising above my old nature. Starting from this decision onwards, I will demand for the upper force to change me.

Before, I didn’t turn to It and didn’t feel anything. But in order to enable me to turn to the upper force, there are people in this world who are in contact with It. They processed and changed their desires, thoughts, and mind, and wrote about the process they underwent thanks to the upper Light.

I read about the process in which the influence of the Light transformed them and I want the same to happen to me. I want to be incorporated in this process, in this action, and to adhere to their story. They tell me about their feelings, about how it works, and about the changes that took place in them. I also want to experience these actions. To the extent that I wish to undergo these changes, I evoke the Light that begins to influence me.

The action of the Light is revealed in the connection with others. Until now I developed my own desire to receive and the mind that helped me use others, but now I have to develop above that in order to connect with others. Only my connection with others will reveal the Light. On the other hand, when the Light is revealed, it will enable me to connect with others.

While reading the book, I only need to acquire a desire so that I will understand and feel that it talks about connection. When the Light is revealed, it is revealed in exactly the same way it is described in the book and will fulfill the connection among us. The book only tells us about this connection and nothing but that.
[65640]
From the 2nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/6/12, The Zohar

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In order to figure anything out, one must either start from the very beginning or the end – from the beginning of creation or from its final goal. After all, what’s in the middle belongs to our work, free choice. By analyzing the beginning and the end, we have to understand what we have to do in the middle.

The difference between the beginning and end of the path lies in acquiring the intention of bestowal. Nothing but this changes in reality. By changing the intention, we attain our difference from the Creator and correct it. Therefore, it is clear that our task lies only in attaining this proper intention.

Every action consists of thought, speech, and action. Thought is the plan preceding everything, which initially includes the result of the action. And in the middle, between the plan and the execution, there is speech, meaning discernment.

And in order to make the proper discernment, there must be concentration. This is why Kabbalists have a custom of being silent, which is also done in this world. When a person is about to undergo an important event and he wants to understand how to do it, he focuses on it, requiring silence, and trying to close himself off so he won’t be bothered by external conversations. He intensely prepares to carry out the action correctly.

That is why we want to spend the weekend in silence, in quiet, and think about how we can attain the right action. Instead of talking, we will make discernments in silence.
[65931]
From the preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/10/12

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Everything depends on intention. This is like the valve in the internal combustion engine, which opens if I have the right intention. And as soon as the intention is gone, the valve closes. That is how I work all the time: I open the valve and close it. Let us hope that we will be able to start up this engine.

The size of the intention is determined by which desires it can rule over. Maybe my intention is only enough for the still level of my desires, or for the vegetative or animate, or for the human level. And clearly, the strongest, most efficient and powerful intentions also influence the small, lower desires.

Therefore, the most important thing for us is to think about group unity, mutual guarantee, because by virtue of that we can undoubtedly rule over all the other, lower desires we have. That is why the condition of mutual guarantee is so necessary.

I think that the friends are also outside of me, and the whole world, all of humanity, and the Creator are also outside of me. But I have to try to attach all of that to me in mutual guarantee, in the right connection, mutual dependence so these desires would unite: me and the Creator inside of me, and all the external systems will also become mine. I should not see anything else besides this, but just the image of one person, who I assemble and take care of.

And if I come out of this inner perception and speak to other people, I live in this world, so naturally, there is a collision between this inner perception and the external world, which appears to me in my senses. But I will have to accept this duality for now, which is no more than a psychological problem. And gradually, I will begin to see a more internal picture.

It’s similar to how there is the perception of an adult and of a child. A child sees only the external side, whereas an adult understands things deeper and sees the inner reasons for what is happening. Even though this is aimed in one direction, but just penetrates deeper into matter since both our intentions and external behavior are egoistic.

However, by developing a habit and making efforts, we can attain a new, true perception of reality.

Therefore, all discernments of intentions, my entire work is to try to change my vision by means of this inner perception, the inner wisdom called the science of Kabbalah, the inner part of the Torah. Then I will see the whole world as one organism in which everything belongs to me and there is nothing besides me.

Let us try to reach this sensation, and especially while reading The Book of Zohar.
[65938]
From the 2nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/10/12, The Zohar

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When we read The Book of Zohar, we must clarify to ourselves in every way we can and especially in our thought and intentions that we are now entering a room where we can ask and receive if the request is the right one. A person should feel that he is given a chance to enter and say one sentence only. If you can’t awaken whoever is in the room upon whom your destiny depends, you will miss that chance and will not get another chance again. If a person feels this way, even if he gets more chances, it can help him.

So we must know:

1. All the changes that we must first desire are changes for bestowal and love of others and from that to the love of the Creator.
2. These changes are fulfilled in us only by the upper force that can influence us and perform the changes only if we want them and only as much as we can want the level above us.

We don’t understand these changes yet, and we don’t fully want them because these changes are towards bestowal and love of others. However, I try as hard as I can. I must believe that if my request is the right one, these changes will immediately take place in me.

So we have to imagine a picture and hold on to it while reading The Zohar while being in the request, in a prayer, in submission and yearning. Even if we haven’t reached the real request, but thanks to our yearning, like a prayer before a prayer, we hope that our request will assume the correct form. If I don’t know how to ask from Him, I ask Him to help me know how to ask.

I can’t tell Him: “I am asking but I don’t know how, so you do it!” That won’t work. He can’t do that, because my request must be correct. Otherwise I have nowhere to receive the correction. This means that I can’t beg with half a request so that He will correct me according to this half request. I can ask Him to correct my half request and make it a full request and only then will the correction come. This is called “a prayer before a prayer.”

Suppose I come to my landlord and have to fill out a request form in which there are many items. Although I have good relations with this landlord and everything is open before me, he still tells me how to fill out the form. When I fill it out, I see the right attitude needed so that I can receive what I want, and he gives it to me.

First I thought that he was ready to give it to me from the bottom of his heart without any preconditions. But this isn’t the case. I have to clarify on this form why, what for, how much, when, how and from whom to receive, and so on. It must all be organized because this is how He correctly stabilizes the receiver in order to receive.
[65305]
From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/4/12, The Zohar

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