In reality, it’s not the group that has to influence you, but you have to tune into the group yourself. When we say that the group has to influence a person, we want to inspire each person to bestow to the group.
The group’s response may be powerful or weak, but that will not affect a person. That’s because our connection and interaction is with the inner group, not the external one. The external behavior of the friends does not play such a substantial role.
Here everything depends on how strongly I tune into them, how much I try to feel their inner aspiration, which does not depend on me or on them. This is a spiritual reality, the unity between us on the level of Infinity.
Therefore, the group influences you to the degree you tune into it and desire to receive its influence, its bestowal.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/27/10, Writings of Rabash