"A judge has nothing more than what his eyes see." This is a very strict law that must be observed very precisely. We cannot follow even the very best advice unless it comes from our own corrections, our similarity to the Light.
Also inside yourself you must ask at all times: "Who am I hearing now? A person who lives inside his own fantasies, or one who looks at things as they really are and knows his exact place, not jumping any higher?"
Then I don’t perceive the things I hear from Kabbalists as laws or even advice, but as "Segula," a miraculous means. I want it to influence me and change me! Once I change, I will then see the truth.
"A judge has nothing more than what his eyes see," meaning that I will actually hold the fulfillment in my "hands," in my Kelim of reception, and I will "see it with my eyes," meaning inside the Light of Hochma. That’s when I will be able to act!
Until that happens, you can memorize the entire Torah by heart and it will do no good; yet the Torah can work as a "miraculous means" or a "spice." You will be able to correct and use your egoism only to the extent you can add this "spice" to your egoism.
Then you will see exactly which desires you can use and to what extent, or how deeply (with which Aviut). This approach, first and foremost, requires correction.
A completely different approach to teaching follows from this, namely, that we have nothing to say to a student. We can only awaken him so he absorbs as much Light that Reforms as possible. It is impossible to give him ready-made behavioral models, but only "miraculous means": the need to unite in the group among friends, and then to wait for him to change on his own.
If this doesn’t affect a student, if he does not change and does not accept the teacher’s advice, then nothing can be done about it. It is impossible to coercively give him exercises that are above his level, but only to the degree he has corrected himself and understood that he has to make the calculation, change, and then start to act.
This greatly restricts the teacher’s possibilities when teaching a student compared to our world, regardless of whether the student is an adult or a child.
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 11/29/10, "Body and Soul"
The Four Exiles