Before, he wished to receive more and more qualitative fulfillment, to be the boss of his life, and to hold everything in his hands. Now, he gradually reaches the realization and acceptance of a new purpose. He discovers that when he fulfills others, this bestowal presents an even greater benefit.
One would think what is there to this except pretty words? Why does it appeal to a person? Everything comes from the Light according to the laws of spiritual physics. The global Kli (vessel), the common soul, the interconnection between everyone, opens up to a person, and then he feels that the right “investment” is to invest into others, which guarantees the eternal, greatest possible benefit. A person doesn’t see this with his own eyes yet, but he already can guess that herein lies a system into which it pays to invest, and he invests into it.
Now he agrees that the Torah, meaning the Light that Reforms, changed and corrected his 613 desires, which is, in fact, the execution of the 613 commandments. By studying, disseminating, and being in a group we expect precisely the influence of the Light. Then, instead of demanding self-fulfillment, we prefer pleasure for others. Bringing them pleasure will be advantageous to us.
This, too, is an egoistic calculation, the intention Lo Lishma (not for Her name). I wish to perform bestowal to others, and I will feel good from this. However, the Light continues to influence me. I become included in the group (the external common Kli) more and more, I submerge myself deeper into the studies, and demand more Light from it. I rouse changes in me, and, finally, I become partially similar to the Creator.
Instead of a personal gain and a “safe investment,” I obtain a feeling of bestowal without a response, and it becomes the greatest possible revelation to me. Even the fulfillment that it brings remains non-repayable and also completely directed at bestowal.
Thereby, I truly become similar to the Creator. After all, due to my own desire and choice and thanks to my effort in the group, the Light has transformed my nature. Through His force, I change myself until I become equal to the Creator in all my desires and actions to such an extent that there can be no differentiation between us, and this similarity is called adhesion.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/15/10, Shamati #16