How can we unite with each other? It is possible only if a person with his desire exists in the friend and the friend within him. Everyone has to absorb the desire of the other and work with it, and in doing so, they connect. Since their desire is aimed at the same goal, through their mutual work they create a common force of aspiration to go forth. This force guarantees their progress and is called Arvut (mutual guarantee).
Connecting occurs when I take part of your desire and experience it as my own, and all my desires serve to fulfill it. Moreover, since your desire is to reach the goal, it turns out that I lead you to it while you lead me. Thus, our desires unite in the common goal. Hence, it is written: “Make your desire as His, and He will make His as yours.”
This is a criterion to verify the extent of our connectedness. The distance between us amounts to 125 degrees (steps), 125 parts of my egoistic desire. But gradually, correcting it through the actions “for your sake,” I come closer to you in my work for bestowal.
That is what is called “love the other as you love yourself.” In other words, I employ your desire to annul mine before it and in so doing, I correct my desire. My desire remains but because I have gone such a distance to reach you, I have made my desire bestowing. Nothing has changed; I’ve only added the intention. And the distance between us disappeared for I annihilated it with my intention!
And what does this “other” want? He wants to attain adhesion with the Creator, just like you do. So, there is only one thing you need to help him with: to become one with the Creator (together with you). This single intention connects us all as one.
Hence we say that we are all in one boat, and it goes in one direction. The closer I come to you, the closer I come to the Creator.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/3/10, Shamati #50