During the preparation for correction the order of the inner work is as follows: Wanting to connect with the friends, I pressure myself and make great efforts. In response, the Light, the force that helps me connect, shines on me. Finally, I complete the connection and immediately the AHP of the higher degree, whose desire to receive is even lower and thicker than mine, is revealed. As a result, I feel that I am in an even greater exile.

So it turns out that the more I try to reach goodness, bestowal, the deeper I sink into evil. However, this immersion into evil is comprised of two parts: On one hand, I still remember the connection that was achieved, the closeness to the friends, and on the other, a new corrupt desire is now revealed to me, even worse than before.

Thus during the period of exile, I grow not in a linear way, but step-by-step. By attaining connection I fall, and not by one degree but by two. It’s because in the beginning I rose to unification (+), then I fell to detachment (-), and so now I feel a double descent (x2). Then everything repeats again and again: I rise and fall even lower.

I always fall not to the previous level of the ego, but from the level I rose to. Therefore, because of every ascent, the next fall is twice as bad. When I rise, I ascend in bestowal, and when I fall, I descend into receiving and into the filth.

Thus a person expands his vessels by building-up the good according to the evil, and thanks to that he advances during the 400 years of exile.

The exile begins when we approach unification in the group. It ends when, having given all our powers to unification, we reach a point when we cannot connect.

During this process we unite and become the people of Israel. It isn’t the same small group that once descended into Egypt because of internal conflicts, like the conflict of Joseph and his brothers, for example. One united nation comes out of Egypt, although it is still impossible to attain Godliness by this unification. At the present state the form of unity is revealed as the control of the desire to receive. Only by our last effort does the escape, the exit from the ego, occur.

In spirituality we also walk on “two legs”: from unity to separation and then to unity again. Pharaoh grows, so does Moses opposite to him, and the Creator is revealed.… All these discernments become greater and greater, and we don’t escape them, but carry on with our work.
[74558]
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/5/2012, Writings of Rabash 

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Question: Why is it so hard to understand what the connection itself is?

Answer: It is hard for us to perform these actions because we initially relate to them and approach them egoistically. I cannot annul my mind in perceiving the world, in perceiving the group, and in perceiving myself, and start clarifying the situation by using a cold external mind.

First we should understand the reason for our actions and what I am required to do. The Creator wants me to bring about the correction of the world. The world is all the reality that appears before me. This means that I have to relate to it accordingly and to be included with the public, with the people, who at their level of development, are also in exile in Egypt; even if they are not in the final stages, they are in very advanced stages. People are already feeling that they have reached a dead end; they are feeling that it is the end of the world; they have encountered ecological problems, wars, famine, suicide, despair, etc. This is the “exile in Egypt” for them, an exile from the prosperity they knew before and helplessness.

In the past a person used to make changes in his life and find relief in it. Today there is nowhere to turn to; one doesn’t find comfort anywhere. There is no comfort at home and in the family, and nowhere to rest. Children don’t show any hope for something good; at work it is impossible to settle for what one really needs together with others since there is no goodness. The hope to rest when one retires is becoming imaginary, and we cannot be sure that when we grow old we will have food and shelter. People live in uncertainty: All their lives they saved in some fund, but if they ever will get this money back is a big question. And these are only some of the problems.

So when we are approaching the Creator, do we take into account what He wants and not what we want? The Creator wants the correction of the world. Is this how we approach people, taking their desires and worrying about them? I am not sure. Do we go out to the people enough, those who, by the way, feel the exile much more than we do? Are we included in their exile, and their corporeal troubles? Do we gradually turn their troubles into spiritual troubles at our level?

If the Light influences people through us, people will feel good. This is what the part of the world called “Israel” should do, to become “Light unto the nations.” For all those who have no contact with the Light, I have to be the “adaptor,” their envoy. Do I start from that?

The Creator wants to bring them Light and advancement, while I am only the link. I have to take their deficiency and to turn it into a necessity to connect at my level, the necessity for the Reforming Light and to transmit this request upwards, and not my personal desires. This means to bestow.

Do we do that? Do we give enough weight to dissemination in order to absorb the people’s desires? The account begins from the lower degree and not from the middle. The true deficiency is concealed in the world, while we receive our deficiency from the Creator and only have to be part of the whole.

By absorbing the deficiency from people, you have to connect with the friends. Otherwise why do you need this connection? What for? Who is your future bestowal intended for? Without the world there is no way you can reach it. The Creator doesn’t need your bestowal; he doesn’t need any favors from you. You can bring Him contentment if you pass His Light downward, if you manage to convince people that they need to change. Then by the slight change in them, you will increase it and raise it to the Creator, and thus draw the connection from the bottom up. You will grow from smallness up to His high level and will take your place in the middle. Without the connection between the two ends, you are playing with something that is based on nothing but the ego.

Question: So what are we doing wrong? After all, we are trying to bring our message to the world.

Answer: It seems that we are not impressed by the world’s desires enough in order to act by them. Eventually we are only left with a “fictitious” formal impression of the work that is done. Everything turns out the opposite: We want to advance and so we use people as a means, instead of being the means for their advancement and to bring people what the Creator wants to bring them. We are turning everything upside down: Instead of being servants, we are becoming the proprietors of the situation. The Creator depends on us, the nations depend in us, while we look at them standing in the middle.

The point is not the actions, but our inner attitude. The deficiency of the Creator and the deficiency of the world are what should be important for us. It is from these deficiencies that we should stabilize our self-deficiency so that it will lead to the desired result. “Israel” belongs to the level of Bina, and it has nothing of its own. Its upper part is the Keter and the lower part is Malchut. In the middle there is only a cut. So how can the two parts be connected? It is we who have to become this connection and this is our only property.
[74697]
From the 4^th  part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/5/12, Writings of Rabash

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Question: You are saying that the desires of the masses should be in first place and not our own spiritual aspirations. But today I am worried about my advancement and this is the reason I disseminate. How can I make this internal transition?

Answer: I have to understand that everything that will happen to me depends on others, on the extent to which I bring them closer to the source. To do that, I have to bring them closer to me, and then they will provide me with the right deficiency in order to turn to the Creator. That’s why they are suddenly important to me.

Next I will discover that they are my parts and then I will find out that they, in fact, are the parts of my soul. The need for the “Self” totally disappears: Let it burn, I only want to provide for them, that’s most important. The previous self-consciousness disappears: My upper part belongs to the Creator, my lower part belongs to the created beings, and I am in the middle, in the neutral middle third of Tifferet that exists only in order to connect the two halves. We shouldn’t do anything with it.

Question: So it follows that when we connect with the masses in order to absorb their desires and to serve them, we do the work among us and we receive the answer somewhere from Above. It’s quite a complicated system….

Answer: The system is simple: Above is the plus and below is the minus, and you allow the entrance in the middle and open up the way.

It can be drawn differently, like a fan. On the left there is positive pressure (P+), on the right there is negative pressure (P-), and you determine what will come out. On one hand, there is the nation, on the other hand there is the Light, and in the middle, Bnei Baruch (BB).

This is exactly how nature is built. This system is normal and natural. Let’s draw it in Kabbalistic terms. Above there are Keter and Hochma, in the middle there is Bina divided into GE (Galgalta ve Eynaim) and AHP (Awzen, Hotem, Peh). At the bottom there is ZON (Zeir Anpin and Nukva). At the top until the middle of Bina there is the system of the Creator, at the bottom there are the lower ones, and among them there is Bnei Baruch. It’s all the same: Above there is the plus, below there is the minus, you are in between, and the tap is in your hands.

This is our work. We connect in the group in order to correspond to the Light, and below we build the system of dissemination that conveys the message of love of others and unity. This is how we connect with the people in order to bring contentment to the Creator.
[74641]
From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/6/12, Writings of Rabash 

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We are part of a system called the world of Infinity. In this Infinity, there exists the desire with various forms and modes of reception and bestowal, as well as the Light that is revealed within the desire to the extent that desire ascribes importance to the attribute of bestowal. The more the desire expresses bestowal, the more the Light is revealed. If the desire doesn’t long for bestowal, the Light is not revealed.

It is called the world of Infinity as all possible forms of creation, from the most egoistic to the most altruistic, from minus Infinity to plus Infinity, exist in it.

Desire itself was created by the Creator, and all of its forms are revealed according to the plan of development that also comes from the Creator. However, as a result of all the metamorphoses and changes that the desire, spinning and boiling in this cauldron, goes through, a new, special point of self-awareness, of independence, is formed. And this point begins to grow in all the states that the desire goes through: to feel more, to understand more, to feel itself as existing, and to attain its independence.

This point is most important because it grew from the middle, third, line. It doesn’t exist in the nature of the Creator nor in the nature of the creature, which is opposite to the Creator and completely subordinate to Him. Of course, it is a derivative, the result of the clash between these two opposite attributes, but it is absolutely independent.

It is difficult for us to imagine how this independence is possible if everything was created by the Creator. But imagine two completely opposite fields, divided by a chasm along the entire range from minus to plus Infinity, where neither one can exist. The border where both of these attributes meet and battle with each other is where the creature can exist independently.

On one hand, it is still considered the created being, meaning that it was created by the upper force. On the other, it has an attribute that makes it possible for it to stand opposite to the upper force, not being under its full control. In the meantime, we are unable to grasp how this is possible. Man doesn’t understand how, being under the full control of the Creator all the time, he can nevertheless remain free!

Two completely different, opposing attributes exist, and the creature can exist only in the abyss between them. It becomes the creature only to the extent that it makes efforts to acquire awareness. This awareness is something third that did not previously exist.

All the rest already had existed in the creature: all the forces, the attributes, and the character that determines who I will be. For all of this, it is written: “Go to the Master Who made me.” However, above all this, I create something third, independent. It is like a child who grows and suddenly becomes independent, having his own opinions. Obviously, this is created under the influence of heredity, education, and environment, but this is the manifestation of his personality, not just a simple sum of fixed parameters according to a plan inscribed into it.

It is like when we cook soup, add all ingredients into it, and in the end receive a new essence called soup. Or we slice and mix five ingredients: tomato, cucumber, onion, salt, and pepper. In the end, a new essence appears called salad.

Today, we live in this world, unconsciously fulfilling the commands of our nature. From where can something new appear to us? Only if you position yourself between the two worlds of reception and bestowal, wanting to belong to both in order not to detach from either of them, but use them both, then thereby you create a new essence, like a new dish, the “salad.” You take all the desire from the world of reception and give it the form of bestowal, which is called Adam.

The fetus is composed of the matter, the desire to receive pleasure, but from the outside, it adopts the form of the Creator, the Light. Then, the substance and form together are called man.

It seems that there is nothing new here as everything already existed. But you did the work—you lent the matter the Creator’s form. You took the matter from one area, the property from the other, and you combined the two together. As a result, a new essence was formed. It is no longer the first or the second, but something third. It’s like the salad that has a meaning on its own; it is a new taste, a new existence.
[73475]
From the 3rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/21/2012, TES

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Preparation to the Lesson
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Writings of Rabash “Dargot HaSulam” 
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The Role of Israel and the World
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Rabash, Shlavei HaSulam (The Steps of the Ladder), 1985, Article 15: And the more they afflicted them”: “And the shell of Egypt, is the general shell, where the sparks of Holiness fell, that the People of Israel who were in Egypt, had to correct them. Then there must first be such pain and suffering that they can’t leave their control, as it says “and the Children of Israel sighed from the work, and they cried out, and their cry rose to the Lord from the work, and the Lord heard their sigh.

There must be a feeling of exile, there must be such strong suffering and pain that “it is better to die than to live” if I can’t come out of Egypt, if I don’t achieve what I want. My desire has to be so big. Otherwise it isn’t a vessel; it isn’t a place for the revelation of what we are looking for.

At the same time, my crying out should be strong not only in quantity but also in quality. I have to know what I am yearning for in exile, what I want to discover, what is happening to me.

So the exile is the most serious preparation for redemption. In exile I clarify things, by clarifying what exactly I want and in what way. This is the reason why the exile cannot be less than 400 years, according to the four phases we go through when we build our vessel. Only at the end of this process can we come out of exile and really receive what we have prepared. The upper Light has no form and now too it fills everything, but we don’t feel it. We must acquire the four phases, a whole vessel, and then the Light will be revealed.

So it isn’t about 400 years, but actually about four whole phases of building our vessel. The forms we develop in it totally depend on each of us. Of course, we receive the initial spur from Above as it is written: “The Creator puts a person’s hand on the good fate and tells him, take it.” But later on a person’s fate is in his own hands.
[74644]
From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/6/12, Writings of Rabash

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We are nearing the exodus from exile only when we begin to understand that we are in it. “Exile” symbolizes my perception of everything that I receive in my desire to receive as worthless and unimportant. Everything that is in my ego belongs to “Pharaoh,” and I am allowed to receive only what is necessary.

This doesn’t mean that I have to limit myself in every way, like a monk living in the desert. I simply don’t see anything material as very important, and accept it as necessary for my existence. All my life is devoted to achieving love for the Creator, the general attribute of bestowal, through the connection with others.

If a person has such an internal necessity and he is included in the group, he begins to aim himself correctly, which means to hate everything he receives in his ego, trying to be satisfied with what is essential. At the same time Pharaoh bribes him and gives him everything. This means that he builds beautiful cities for his ego, Pithom and Ramses.

He feels that in relation to the intention of in order to bestow in which he wants to be in his thoughts and heart, he is in exile, because he has no powers to bestow. Then he feels that he has complaints towards the Creator, for not helping him come out of exile, which means that He doesn’t let him be the one who bestows.

But in the meantime a person’s desire is very small and he has to go through 400 years in exile. This means that he has to raise his desire until he will really want to bestow.

All our work in the exile in Egypt is in a group in which everyone grows stronger and receives from others the greatness of the goal, the pure bestowal, and the nothingness and meanness of his preset state in which it is impossible to achieve mutual bestowal. From a spiritual point of view, this is very bad.

So a person begins to perceive the term “exile” correctly: exile refers to bestowal, the ability to bestow, and so he really feels that he is in exile in Egypt. Until he reaches a state in which he cannot bear it any more. Then the “ten plagues of Egypt” begin.

A “plague” or blow symbolizes the fact that you are offered different good corporeal things, but in spirituality you receive nothing, and a person feels this as a blow.

He feels the hardening of the heart, and the corporeal desires keep growing. He has no choice. He understands that the egoistic desire will continue to grow and to confuse him by distracting him and drawing his attention to different corporeal goals, different clarification in the group, so that he will overcome the corporeal ego by the contact with the friends. Only from them can he learn to appreciate the way and the goal of creation more, the greatness of the Creator, and the meanness of the egoistic filling.

One can receive all these values only from the society, from the environment. Then, despite the difficulties and the interruptions, he still adheres to the group above his feelings and his mind because only in it does he find protection and salvation. He understands that otherwise he is lost. He understands that only when he looks above the egoistic desire because from the point of view of the ego the situation could be wonderful and bring knowledge and other benefits.

When he interprets the whole situation correctly, he discovers that he is facing Pharaoh. This stems from many reasons, attributes, and attempts that he accumulates for 400 years in exile in Egypt: the four phases he has been through in each of his desires to receive when he raised the yearning for bestowal above it, which is called “faith above reason.”

Going through these four phases is called “the time of preparation.” And when it is about to end, a strong resistance to the ego is revealed, called the ten plagues of Egypt, darkness. These are final clarifications and revelations that really help a person exit the slavery to his ego.

Thanks to them he grows stronger and finally escapes in the dark, at night, feeling them in his desire to receive with one point that leads him, called “Moses.” Thus he raises his ego and achieves redemption.
[74637]
From the 1^st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/5/12, Shamati

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A person decides what to consider the day and what the night: what is good for him and what is bad. Sometimes, he is given awakening, raising of the spirit, great light, and he understands how wonderful it is to enjoy and come closer to spirituality. He calls it day, but in reality, it is light in his egoistic desire. Egoism enjoys, and this is not called spiritual advancement.

Or maybe he feels in the dark, exhausted, but his mind understands that this state is useful for advancement. And although in his desire to enjoy he experiences unpleasant sensations, it is said: “I sleep, but my heart is awake.” The desire to enjoy feels darkness, but the point in the heart—Light. A person understands that this darkness is useful for him, descent precedes ascent, and he needs to prepare even greater desires for this. And the desire comes from darkness.

That is why it all depends on what a person values, what he considers the day and what the night—in his sleeping egoistic heart or in the point in the heart, which is burning and yearning for spirituality.

If a person begins to separate one from the other, then he already has two points, according to which he can aim and direct himself exactly to the goal. One point is his ego. And it is good that egoism does not feel anything good. The darker I feel in my egoism, the greater my desire (Aviut) will be above which the point seeking the goal exists.

The main thing is to separate these two points and all the time hold them correctly against each other, finding out with what I identify myself. Do I choose the direction that leads me to the Creator, although my path lies in the dark, do I consider it good? Then, I can be sure that I move correctly because my egoism is not interested in rushing there, like a thief, running ahead of everybody else and shouting: “Catch the thief!”

My ego does not want darkness, and I rise above ego, above reason, and want my bestowal to be above reception. And this is a good state in which my day and the day of the Creator are the same day.

And if I suffer that I feel bad and have no interest in advancing, it means that I follow my desire to enjoy, my ego. I run there where my egoistic heart, but not the point in the heart, calls me: This is the difference.

We need to try to divide ourselves into two parts: the point in the heart, which faithfully adheres to the goal, to bestowal in any situation, no matter what happens, and the heart itself, which is always eager to receive. Its appetite is growing constantly. Darkness reigns in my heart, and there is a ray of Light in the point in the heart; this means that I directed myself correctly. And I achieve this through the environment, group, external force, which is needed to pull the point in the heart out of the egoistic heart and aim it at the goal.
[74550]
From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/5/12

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Question: It is written, “I, HaVaYaH, do not change.” What does this symbolize in our work?

Answer: The Light comes from Above, and it is all bestowal. It is good and benevolent, and it created “existence from absence,” something from nothing, a desire that is absolutely controlled by receiving. It only wants to feel good.

Then, the Light begins to develop the desire by putting it through four phases. As a result, it doesn’t feel itself simply as Light, but as the one who receives, who is opposite to the source. This summons shame, a terrible feeling, and it has nothing more than that.

It turns out that receiving is a good thing, and there is nothing wrong in being the opposite, but these two factors together create a feeling in me that I cannot bear. It tears me to pieces, and I am ready to do anything just to not remain in this state even one second longer. I am ready to do anything. Even committing suicide is no problem. The main thing is not to suffer, not to bear this oppositeness.

This is true shame. We don’t know it. We use the word, but we don’t know what it means. In Part One of The Study of the Ten Sefirot, “Inner Reflection,” Baal HaSulam says that shame was prepared for the high souls, and they are the ones that discover it. This is because, in order to do so, one has to feel the Creator, His pure bestowal, and one’s own pure receiving to the fullest. One contradicts the other.

The process that is described here flows from the top down and is called “the four phases of the Direct Light.” So, by its influence, the Light leads the created being through his development.

This is the structure of HaVaYaH: the tip of Yod, Yod, Hey, Vav, Hey. This structure is fixed, and it appears this way from the top down.

Until now, the development was done by the Direct Light. From this point onward, it is your turn. However, you feel terrible shame. It simply burns you from the inside, and you can’t bear it. Therefore, from now on, you won’t be able to relax until you balance the shame.

First, you want to escape it, but that doesn’t change anything. Everything remains the same. It isn’t possible to relax, and you have to change yourself, but how can you do that?

The created being simply “goes crazy.” The shame tears him from his place, tears him from his desires, and keeps on pushing him forward to end of the road. He cannot rest until the one who receives and the one who bestows become equal in their bestowal.

Only when we reach Gmar Tikun (the end of correction) will we stop changing. Then, the shame will disappear, and the oppositeness between the Creator and us will disappear.

So, the Creator says “I, HaVaYaH, do not change,” which means only that I brought this process down. However, this is enough to not allow us to rest until Gmar Tikkun.

Only then will we reach harmony and begin changing together with Him, according to Him. The Creator won’t be the first. We will merge with Him into one to such an extent that all the differences in thought, in our desire, and in every other way will disappear. We will start everything together in cooperation.
[74047]
From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/30/12, “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot”

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Preparation to the Lesson
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Shamati #159 “And It Came to Pass in the Course of Those Many Days“
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