Question: What is this stage of bestowing for the sake of bestowal?

Answer: What kind of pleasure does the desire to receive receive from bestowing? What does bestowal mean to it? How can we attach the intention for the sake of bestowal to the desire to receive?

For this, I must connect myself to someone outside myself, someone external, which, in fact, does not exist for us at all, and we do not understand what it is. In other words, I must connect my desire to receive with someone else’s desire to receive. This someone could be a friend, the group, or the Creator. Then for me, the Creator is as though a desire to receive, because I care about His well-being, which means that He has a desire to receive.

This is how I imagine it, and I take care that this desire to receive experiences pleasure. After all, this is the only way I can understand it! I want Him to enjoy! Then I connect my desire to receive with some external desire, an external need, and live within this external desire. It has become important to me.

It is as though I detach myself from myself to the point that I care only about what is there. Here, we return to the example of a mother and her infant: the infant occupies all her attention. She works to meet its needs and is not concerned about herself at all.

So, what does bestowing for the sake of bestowal mean? It means doing everything that He desires. At the same time, the pleasure I experience is in Him. I bestow, and bestow, while my pleasure is in Him. Receiving for the sake of bestowal, on the other hand, means discovering that I can give Him pleasure only to the extent that I myself experience pleasure! I enjoy, and only then does He enjoy! This is double connection.

When I bestow for the sake of bestowal, I do not experience the pleasures that pass through me; I am simply present within Him. I am constantly working with His need, and this is my pleasure: what is felt there. But when I work with the desire to receive for the sake of bestowal, I must experience pleasure myself, and only to that extent can I feel that He is enjoying Himself. Now our pleasures work together: our needs operate together as one unified need.

Therefore, in Kabbalah, we say that when bestowing for the sake of bestowal, I work with the Aviut of Shoresh, Aleph, and Bet, whereas when receiving for the sake of bestowal, I work with the Aviut of Gimel and Dalet. In other words, when receiving for the sake of bestowal, I work with the Kelim of reception; when bestowing for the sake of bestowal, I work with the Kelim of bestowal, whose Aviut is relatively small.

In fact, the Kelim with Aviut Shoresh, Aleph, and Bet are also Kelim of reception, but in them I do not feel pleasure from bestowing upon Him. More precisely, of course, I do feel pleasure, but it does not depend on my bestowal upon Him.

It is just like the example of a mother who gives to her child: she does not have to experience pleasure herself in order to care for the child; she only needs to feel whether he is enjoying himself. Whereas when receiving for the sake of bestowal, I must feel my own pleasure, and my sensation of His enjoyment also depends on this feeling. It is as though I unite both our desires to receive—mine and His—so that one depends on the other. This gives a person an unlimited Kli!

When receiving for the sake of bestowal, the receiving Kli is unlimited. When bestowing for the sake of bestowal, you simply bestow; there is no limitation, but the Kelim, the desires, are not revealed. My Kli, my desire, does not participate in this process. It participates only in my concern for Him, and my degree of Bina depends on the Aviut He has; that is, on the extent to which I reveal Him as the recipient of my bestowal.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/12/26, Rabash, “His Law He Contemplates”

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