If the desire to enjoy cares only about itself at the detriment of others, it is called egoism. If the desire to enjoy, which receives the ability to give from above, that is, the ability to work with one’s desire in contrast to one’s natural instinct to enjoy himself and instead to give pleasure to others, it is called the desire to bestow.
A desire is able to behave this way if it considers the one to whom it gives more important than itself. If I value you more than myself, then instead of taking for myself, I will give to you.
In our world, it is easy to do. After all, if I see that I depend on the one who is higher, more important, and stronger than me, then I am ready to give to him. I do this based on the same egoistic calculation because by giving it to him, I will win even more than if I took it myself.
There are, however, two conditions for genuine, non-egoistic bestowal. First, the object I want to give to has to be hidden. I should not feel its importance, otherwise I will certainly give with egoistic intentions, as it plays out in this world. Besides, I need to get more strength for such bestowal, despite the total lack of egoistic motivation.
First, we are helped from above, the importance of the higher is hidden. Then, one needs to do it on his own. Other than that, one has to receive the power of bestowal from above. Then I will have the opportunity to give to the Creator although in my corporeal eyes He has no importance. On the contrary, I see that the whole world and I myself am much more important. However, I gain the power of bestowal atop my nature. This is called faith above reason, above one’s own opinion. This is a true miracle from above.1
It is said: “A lifeline has been thrown to us by the Creator.” Why are there so many disappointed people who have not achieved anything? It is because they did not want to hold onto the rope. Everyone gets a lifeline; it hangs right in front of your nose, but you do not want to notice it.
Once one grabs the rope, he starts to get closer to a Kabbalistic group, he gets absorbed in it, and dissolves. We people think the opposite: that we are ready to do anything alone and that these actions will help us.
People remain in this delusion for 10, 20, 30, even 40 years, until they finally agree not to bow down. The force comes from above and they become ready to annul themselves in everything, bow their heads, and join the ten. They are ready to do anything: to give up everything just to join the group.
This is very difficult. It requires self-scrutiny, clarification, and overcoming. One should be very straightforward and honest with himself and with the group.2
From the 3rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/29/18, Writings of Baal HaSulam,“A Speech for the Completion of The Zohar“