Answer: "Forbidden" in Kabbalah means impossible. It would be similar to saying that egoists mustn’t get the upper Light. Try to break this law and we’ll see what happens.
We are talking about the laws of nature, and nature doesn’t ban anything. But if you go against it, you will be punished. “Prohibition” means inability. If Kabbalists write “no,” it means you are unable to do it.
Egoists can’t learn the Torah, or in other words, they can’t study the Torah because an egoist cannot do so in principle. He has no means for it, no tools. After all, he is a gentile and worships his own ego that won’t allow him to establish a connection with the Lights.
The Torah, or the wisdom of Kabbalah, is the method that connects the vessels and the Lights. But if you don’t have the former, you can’t find the latter. And therefore, you can’t learn the Torah since “Torah” is the passages of the Light that expands into desires according to the law of equivalence of form.
Question cont.: So what are we doing during the lessons?
Answer: We are moving toward it. We employ the Torah as the Light that Reforms; we use it as if from a distance.
At a higher spiritual degree, there are the Lights and vessels, and I am cut away from them. But I wish to be at this rung and in the degree of my motivation, I draw from it a small illumination that is preparing me for an ascent.
Thus, I use the Torah as the Surrounding Light but not the Light in the full sense of this word. I am not studying the Torah as such yet. The real study is the expansion of the Lights in the reformed vessels (desires), the interaction between the Light and the desire by way of the screen. That is what the Torah is.
My spiritual “I” is the receiving desire which is reformed by the intention to bestow and able to receive the Light. Wishing to achieve this, we read Kabbalistic books, yearn with all our might, and work in the group in order to somehow express our desire aimed at bestowal.
But a response arrives only in the form of the Surrounding Light. I don’t even know what it is, but time after time, I feel changes within me: a little more understanding, a bit more sensation. It isn’t the Torah yet. The real Torah is something concrete: desire, the screen, and connection between them, which leads to the revelation of the Creator, or the Light in the vessel.
But still, even now we are using the force of the Torah. This is described as: “I created the evil inclination and I created the Torah as a spice since the Light in it Reforms.”
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/12/11, The Writings of Rabash