The Formula For Friendship

Dr. Michael LaitmanOpinion (Irina Gusinsky, deputy editor of Alpina Publisher): “People are social animals. However, more and more people admit that they feel lonely and unable to build lasting relationships. The problem has only worsened with the rise of social networks. Establishing contact is a problem for us.

“Friends can and should be nurtured by the friendship formula: Friendship = Proximity + Frequency + Duration + Intensity.

“Proximity is the willingness to let a person into a personal space. It increases when a person does not feel threatened.

“The frequency and duration of contact means that the more time we spend with the person, the more we learn about each other and the more we influence each other.

“Intensity is the extent, to which we can meet the friend’s needs.

“This formula reflects how to create a relationship; we are invited to approach it consciously, without complicating. Rather than waiting for favorable opportunities, it is better to teach one’s body to send friendly signals (eye contact, head tilt, smile, listening skills, calling a companion by name, carry on a conversation within his interests, respecting his point of view …) and visiting the places where we can find people in whom we could be interested.

“People do not have friends just because they are lazy to establish contact and then to maintain a relationship.”

My Comment: No method, except the method of integral education and upbringing, the wisdom of connection, can help us create a warm and friendly atmosphere because egoism will place everyone in an isolating cocoon. Only the highest great goal—eternal and perfect life, filled with Light, the revelation of the Creator—will encourage us to unite.

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