Check The Source Of Nourishment
Question: When you go out to disseminate, people’s positive responses make you feel good. So where do these powers come from, is it from my ego or from the Creator?
Answer: If you don’t demand powers from the Creator, then you naturally receive them from the ego. There are only two sources for a person’s motivation and accordingly it may be egoistic or higher, either in order to receive or in order to bestow.
So how can you check yourself? How can you find out that you are actually working in order to bestow?
I feel different disappointments, problems, emptiness, and even troubles in my desire, but I only demand one thing from the Creator, to raise my altruistic motivation without any reward for myself. I am glad that my ego feels bad, that it is empty and dissatisfied. It is a good sign; if I can continue working now it is indeed in order to bestow.
According to Kabbalistic terms, I “restrict” my desire, and put a screen (Masach) and the Returning Light (Ohr Hozer) on top of it. Generally speaking the desire always remains empty since restriction is not nullified. Then I begin to work above my desire in order to bestow, being sure that I relate to life, to reality, to the Creator, and to everyone correctly.
But if I don’t feel emptiness, disappointments, or troubles in my ego in order to be drawn above them to bestowal, to worrying about the Creator, then it means that I am still in my egoistic desire. I work in it, and although I advance towards the intention of in order to bestow, I am still immersed in self love. Of course, I try to bestow, but all my attempts are nourished by egoistic motives. This means that if I didn’t receive pleasures, I would have no motivation, no powers, no urge to carry on along the spiritual path
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/8/13, Questions and Answers
Related Material:
Learning To Work While Disregarding The Results
Asking To Love
When All Doubts Will Dissipate
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Feedback I got: ‘disseminate’ the word, gets associated with semen, suggest using “distributin”, “distribution of”. Modern electronics and software industry use distribution, the term for exactly this sense, meaning: “provision of”.
We are providing the method, distributing the method.
Disseminating… They think this has relation to sex, which is not, but people are very dumb nowadays and think we are advocating these ugly habits… Kind of…
Why Ohr Hozer is “returning light”? I thought its external light, whereas Ohr Pnimi is Internal Light, the light inside, i.e. Koakh Ashpaa Pnimi, whereas Ohr Khozer is Koakh Ashpaa ve sviva, from he environment. And balance of these two requires the Masach, shield, not to lekabel, receive for own pleasure, not to ashpaa, give for receival, so forth. And that 4 stages: aler, bet, gimel, dalet are related to 4 combinations of ashpaa and lekabel.
Could you elaborate on this in practical terms, giving specific examples duing the night lesson or in some upcomind TV broadcast?
There seems to be interest from girls, but their interest seems to be related to calculating benefit from identifying different kinndw of people in their environment and deciding on how to act, very unspecific. Broadcasts related to family success seem not to interest them much, especially young ones, as their world is quite cruel.