At yesterday’s seminar we had a general, collective opportunity in all the groups all over the world to rise above our heavy sensation. We were pinned down by this heaviness and it was difficult for us to connect and rise in our mind and heart.

We felt that we couldn’t do it. We were missing the necessary intensity of feeling and clarity of thinking, and that is a wonderful state for our work, which we have to enter for one moment in order to feel it. Yet we must know in advance that we are now experiencing this heavy sensation and will discern it in order to immediately rise above it.

Thus, I am experiencing these sensations that pass through my mind and heart: dullness of feeling, dimness of thought and consciousness, and now I rise above all of this. I don’t care what I now feel; above it I want to build a completely new state which is not based on my animate, earthly mind and feelings, but is related to the higher state, spirituality, bestowal.

This means that I will receive completely new instruments of perception and desire, which are above me and completely do not depend on me. I use other’s desires, not my own, but thoughts that are foreign to me, meaning those that belong to others, so that through them I will bestow to the Creator and to them. Then I don’t have any problems since I am not closed inside of myself, but I rise above my egoistic perception.

This heavy feeling came precisely in order to show us whether or not we can rise and fill the world with Light, whether we can give something to humanity. The sensation suited the topic of the seminar precisely. It was a complete package; everything was arranged perfectly from above.

Our groups should have connected together as much as possible, above this entire sensation of heaviness, and thought about our influence on the world according to the topic of the seminar.

Women found a wonderful answer to the question of how we should give to the world and how the world should connect to us, through the example of a mother who breastfeeds her baby. This is a very precise example because is reflects the transition from the round Sefirot (Igulim) to straight desires (Yosher).

That is, we rise above our desires and thoughts and find a new vessel thanks to our unity. When every person comes out of himself and becomes included in others, he comes out of his thoughts and sensations and acquires new desires and reason in which he is not limited by anything at all. This is the form in which we advance.

But some people get immersed in their sensation of bitterness and darkness and suffer because of it instead of turning it upside down and transforming it to Light through their work, ascending above the darkness. A person should ask: why does he prefer to suffer? Does he really love suffering so much? This is stupid and results from our pride, our inability to rise above ourselves.

Or maybe you don’t understand that your spiritual vessel is not inside of you, but above you? And that all of these difficult sensations in the heart and mind are meant to help you ascend. The general force of the group must awaken you and help you do this, so why aren’t you using it? And the teacher tells you that you have to ascend. Don’t you understand that, or don’t you hear it?

But in any case, this is a good study. This heaviness is simply a gift from above, corresponding precisely to the chosen seminar topic. This is how we are being shown how easily we could rise above it, but we weren’t able to. And all of it is due to insufficient value of the environment, lack of importance, and the need to rise above this sensation.

This only shows that the quality of bestowal to which I ascend is less important to me than the sensation in my own stomach. First of all I want to feel good myself, and only then am I ready to ascend higher. Look at how egoistic this condition is.
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From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 6/11/12, Writings of Baal HaSulam

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