How To Help A Friend

Dr. Michael Laitman with StudentsRabash’s article “They Helped Everyone His Friend,” 1984 (the text in bold)

I am unable to advance without the help of the others since only through unity with them can I discover that the spiritual world is revealed in the connection between us. In our world, sometimes I need assistance from someone who is strong, rich, kind, or intelligent. Likewise, I need the help of a person equal and similar to me regarding the purpose of life.

We must understand how one can help his friend. Is this where there are rich and poor, wise and fools, weak and strong?

In our world, help is needed when there are disparities between people; that is where we discover an opportunity to help. If, however, people are equal, then there is no place for assistance. Help in our world extends from a whole person to the one who lacks.

When all are rich, smart, or strong, etc.? How can one help another?

Generally speaking, we are not excited if we have to turn to someone for help. We feel shame, pride, and envy. We don’t want to admit that we need something or depend on someone, and we strive for separation.

We see that there is one thing that is common to all: the spirit. It is said, “A concern in one’s heart, let him speak of it with others.” This is because with regard to feeling high-spirited, neither wealth nor erudition can be of assistance.

An uplifted mood is the result of confidence in the benevolent future. But if a person knows that he has to save himself and can’t do it alone, he falls into depression.

Rather, it is one person who can help another by seeing that one’s friend is low. It is written, “One does not deliver oneself from imprisonment.”

If the prison is our world, then only a friend who shares the same goal can free me from this prison and help me enter the Upper World.

Rather, it is one’s friend who can uplift his spirit (meaning, to give him confidence in reaching the goal). This means that one’s friend uplifts him from his state into a state of livelihood. Then one begins to acquire confidence and wealth once more in life, and he begins as though his goal is now near him.

I’m desperate because I can’t reach the spiritual goal without external help. I cannot force anyone, but I found a friend who is willing to help me. And he will be able to help me not by way of his knowledge or wealth, but by his desire to reach the common goal.

It turns out that each and every one must pay attention and think, how he can help his friend, uplift his spirit, because regarding one’s spirit, anyone can find a needy place in one’s friend, which he can fulfill.

It doesn’t mean that you have to entertain your friend. We must evoke in each friend a feeling that the goal is reachable. Then he will be filled with the spirit of life and rise above this corporeal life, above this world which looks like a prison to him. When a person has such a friend, he feels certain that he is able to break free from this prison.

From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/26/10, "“They Helped Everyone His Friend”

Related Material: Post: How Can I Help a Friend? Post: Practical Advise By Rabash Post: Great, Small And Equal To A Friend And The Creator

One Comment

  1. Last night’s Webinar for the LIU group was very interesting. The topic of why we go to lessons highlighted the reasons we attend ( Rav, Unity, the goal) and it brought to light a concern I (and my husband) have had since we began this quest: the gender issue.

    The fact only men attend the lessons is definitely a ‘cultural’ and ‘traditional’ issue. This notion that men get distracted by women does not address the reality that PEOPLE get easily distracted.
    Women get distracted by men, other women and other thoughts.
    Men get distracted by women, other men and other thoughts. We are all beasts.

    Spiritual Unity is not a gender issue. We need each other. If both men and women were present, I believe Rav would remind us of our jobs and we would accomplish them together and in a more powerful way.
    I love that the LIU group is mixed. We are Living In Unity: one soul with one heart; discussing shared concerns.

    I believe that Congresses are very powerful, why? because men and women are working together. I believe Unity days are powerful for the same reason.

    We are the generation of the Messiah. Shouldn’t we be together to reach the goal?

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